St. Patty’s Day Woohoo!

Despite my lack of decorations for St. Patrick’s Day, I decided I would still make cupcakes for my peeps. Cause that’s how I roll. I used devil’s food batter and put green food coloring in the white, whipped icing. Very festive.

And while I was baking, Todd sat down to cut some shamrocks out of green construction paper, just so I’d have something to put up in my cube.

Well, cutting some shamrocks turned into cutting shamrock garland, which turned into making me Irish flags. Kayleigh joined in and by the time they finished, I had a very large bag of St. Patrick’s Day decorations.

My cube was a hit. Even Mr. Cranky Non-Decorating Co-Worker liked the decorations. And they were extra special because they were handmade.

I love my little creative family.

St. Patty's Day Poo Poo

So, I went to the Dollar Tree yesterday to load up on enough St. Patrick's Day decorations to make my co-workers, and even my boss, throw up. And wouldn't you know it...

The two aisles of green decorations were reduced to one little corner by the door. They had hats. And whistles. And that's it.

Now what am I supposed to do?!

I've got people coming by, asking when the decorations are going up! This isn't just about me and my need to be the center of attention and the department moral gal. I have fans! They want decorations! And this is my holiday. I'm Irish! I think.

And I'm marrying a Scotsman!

Help me!

I could have Todd (artist extraordinaire that he is) draw me a shamrock, then I could use that as a stencil and make a ton of green, construction paper shamrocks. But would that be enough? I could bring in my little iPod speakers and blare the Pogues, The Dropkick Murphys and Flogging Molly all day. Would that get my Irish across?

I'm just at a loss.

I may have to make up for this at Easter. Bunnies EVERYWHERE.

That'll get 'em.

Weekend Update

Our weekend was jam packed with all of the excitement you would expect from me and TBFE. Isn’t that why you read our blogs?

Friday night was movie night. Steve, Stephanie and the most adorable child on the planet, Isabella, came over to enjoy pizza and “Over the Hedge”. Which is freakin’ hilarious, even to the adults.

Then early to bed because it had been a long, long week.

Saturday was a bit discombobulated.
Kayleigh should have marched in the St Patrick’s Day parade at 12:30, but due to a lost clarinet, the plan changed to not even go, which was a-okay because it was 35 degrees out and pouring the rain Saturday morning. And as you know, Rae-rae don’t do crowds. I did, however, buy some kava kava, which my massage therapist recommended to calm me in those anxiety-ridden situations. So I was ready!

But then the rain let up and Grandma Kit called to see if Kayleigh wanted to still go the parade so she could cheer for her girlfriends, so they were off at 11:30am. And Tyler had a meeting for Norwestcon so he was gone for a few hours.

The kids’ plans evolved and changed and changed again around us, but Todd and I held steady. In our sweats. Surrounded by paper. As we cleaned out the four drawer file cabinet. Pro-freakin’-ductive.

Kayleigh had an overnight after the parade, and Tyler was holed up playing some new video games, courtesy of a wonderful friend of Todd’s, so we came to a stopping point in our cleaning and went out for a nice mini-date. Then came home, curled up and watched a couple of movies. Freeway, which Todd had never seen and True Romance , which I had never seen. Both equally violent (well, True Romance was probably more violent) and twisted. And then to bed.

Sunday, Todd skipped his usual Sunday coffee with a friend and instead, took Tyler to see Watchmen. And I piddled around an EMPTY HOUSE all BY MYSELF for three hours (oh my gawd) until it was time to leave to go purchase The Dress.

Yes, the wedding dress had been purchased. It’s very exciting.

Unfortunately, it’s not a purchase off the rack kind of thing, so I won’t actually have the dress until August. Which is probably best. Because I could totally see myself locking myself in the bedroom to put it on and prance around. So yes, best that it’s not in my house.

After dress purchasing, Kim, who had joined me for the final try on, and I grabbed some lunch and just chatted. We haven’t been able to do much of that lately, and that makes me sad. West Seattle really isn’t that far from Ballard, but it’s far enough to make popping in on Kim-n-Tim-Milo very difficult. Maybe the summer will make it easier for all of us to get together and hang out. Barbecues, picnics at Greenlake, picnics at Alki.

Sigh.

Man, I can’t wait until the warm weather gets here.

Did I mention it snowed again this weekend? Yeah. It’s not so much fun anymore.

Where was I?

Oh, bonding with Kim.
After the bonding with Kim, I swung by the house to grab Todd and head to run a couple of errands. Then off to pick up Kayleigh and Tyler, then to Target for some house stuff, then to the grocery store for dinner, then home to cook dinner and clean up after dinner, then finishing up laundry, then picking up the bedroom, then painting my fingernails (hussy red!) then tucking everyone in and then finally, sweet sweet sleep. Ah……

I’m already looking forward this weekend.
How sad is that?

It May Be Time For Therapy

I bought another pair of shoes.



No, I don’t know when I’ll wear them, but every woman needs a pair of black, patent leather dress shoes, right? Just in case?

Seriously

Yes, a vacation would be lovely right about now. It wasn't even 30 degrees when we woke up this morning. We've got sun! But we've got ice, too.

A big, fat *thpppt* to Trish, Dan and Jesse, who are livin' it up in Kauai right now.

I hope it's snowing when you get back.
That'll teach ya.

To Pee or Not To Pee?

I’ve been emailing with Nichole this morning about the poofy dresses. A lot of my Facebook statuses (stati?) have been about the poof. I do love the poof. The poof controls me. These hips were MADE for the poof!

Anywho, I mentioned that I needed to actually control the poof. I’d still like to be able to fit into a restroom stall. She mentioned (very sarcastically) about how going to the potty was in one of these things was just oodles of fun. Which made me think, what if I didn’t HAVE to go to the potty? What if the potty came to me?

Which is when I thought of David Sedaris’ very funny bit about the Stadium Pal.

I wanted to quote this, but when I Googled “stadium pal”, I found that someone has actually created it. And even better, there is a Stadium Gal.

Well, slap me and call me Sissy!

I could strap this baby on and I wouldn’t even have to try and cram myself into a bathroom stall. And no one would be the wiser!

Until about 9pm, after I had peed in this thing all day and the smell finally wafted out from under the gown. Talk about setting a mood for the boudoir that night! And thank goodness, TBFE and I aren't doing the whole garter thing. How embarassing!

Hmmm.....

Maybe I’ll just keep the poof to a minimum.

Long Weekend Update

My weekend actually started Thursday afternoon. I came home from work, sick. Not too terribly sick, but fighting something and just utterly exhausted. So I crawled into bed around 1pm, and slept until dinner.

Woke up Friday morning and just hurt, so back to bed I went.

Which, apparently was just what I needed because I was feeling much better by the time we headed out to a birthday party that night for a theater friend of Todd's. Luckily, the party was very tame. Like, curl up in a chair and watch the entertainment tame. There was also jambalaya, but I skipped it. As hard as it was.

I slept in Saturday (but still woke up in time to watch it SNOW), then TBFE and I made a big country breakfast. Biscuits, gravy, bacon and eggs. Yummy-poo. Around noon, Kayleigh and I jaunted off to a bridal shower way the hell up north and afterwards, we hit a bridal shop, just because we were nearby and I’m all about exploring as many options as possible before settling on a dress.

(I actually hit a fourth bridal shop late last week, where I found absolutely nothing worth even trying on. A clear sign I’ve made up my mind about a dress, huh?)

I tried on three dresses, more for Kayleigh than for me, but it just confirmed that I know exactly what I want. So, hopefully, I’ll get The One purchased in the next week or two. Might need one to try it on one more time, just to be sure.

After the bridal shop, we walked outside to find an amazing hailstorm/blizzard occurring. It was merely spitting a rain snow mix when we went in, but holy geez. You know the dipping dots ice cream? It looked like vanilla dipping dots everywhere. But they were little snowy ice balls. Baffling.

By the time we got back to Seattle, the sun was shining and the roads were dry. Huh.

Saturday night we curled up and watched Lars and the Real Girl, a very sweet and funny movie about a man and his sex doll.

Afterwards, I got a wild hair and went through the last two boxes of miscellaneous papers from the fire. I climbed up on the bed, turned the TV to "Happy Gilmore" and had a field day organizing the pertinent papers into piles and throwing the impertinent papers in the recycle bag.

And I came across an envelope that contained numerous cards and letters from complete strangers, who had written Todd and the kids after reading an article in the Seattle PI. Many of them sent checks. One woman apologized for not being able to send more but said she was in assisted living and on a fixed income. I just sat there, reading through them all and crying. I think I tend to forget how horrible 2005 and 2006 were for my new family. But reading the letters brought it all to the surface and put me right there with what they went through. I'm so impressed with how well Todd got himself and his kids through such an unbelievable year. And I think I am very lucky to have him, and the kids, in my life.

Sniff.

[ahem]

Anywho!

Sunday, even more sleeping in (not lazy, “sick”), then off to see “Always, Patsy Cline” at the ACT Theater. Don was part of the band, and while the play was good (just don’t get me started on Patsy’s singing….good, but nothing like the real Patsy), it was more fun to watch Don have such a great time. Hopefully, this will not be the end of his theater career.

After the play, dinner then grocery shopping then jammies, then curled up in bed watch Saturday Night Live specials and flipping through a wedding magazine. And asleep by 10. Whew.

And believe it or not, even with such a busy weekend, I feel pretty good. All the sleep must have kept the sickness at bay. Thank goodness.

And we're getting snow again today.
But global warming is just a myth.....

My Shoe Fetish

After reading this article, I don’t think I have a shoe problem at all. I think I’m doin’ a-okay.

My Superhero

This is newest Facebook thingy going around.
I'm a superhero.

Fear me.


Yeah.
I'm hawt.

Random Thoughts

Apparently it doesn’t matter how early I go to bed, I absolutely hate waking up in the morning. TBFE and I were in bed at 8:30 Tuesday night, fell asleep right at 10, and I was just as cranky and mad when I woke up. I’m tired of it.

Haha. Get it? “Tired” of it.

Man, I’m funny.

**********

Went dressing shopping again last night. You just don’t realize how exhausting it is until you’re in your car driving home and you turn off the radio because if you hear one more ANYTHING you will cry.

Oh sure, it’s fun to walk around in the poofy dresses, but you’re also taking in so much information from the woman cramming you into the gown and from your girlfriends. I don’t know how women take five and six people with them. I could totally see myself losing it and telling them all to shut up.

Kim and Jamie aren’t bad at all. I don’t tell them to shut up.

**********

However, this may be a sign that I’m getting into this wedding dress stuff more than I like to admit.

While looking through bridal magazines now, I can just glance at the name of the designer and think either “Ooh, I love their stuff!” or “Ew, not interested.”

I know the designers by name.
Just like I know my beautiful red shoes by name.

Anne Klein.
Christa.

Sigh.

**********

I’m thinking of taking up Bikram’s yoga again. I was going two or three days a week back in 2001 and I felt wonderful. The biggest indicator that I was going something really good for my body was that it was SO EASY to cross my legs. No hoisting one up on top of the other one.

Because my tendons were tight, not because my thighs were fat.
Just so you know.

**********

I am in one foul mood today. I’m exhausted and I have a headache right behind my left eye.

I would say I can’t wait for the weekend, but the items on the agenda don’t even sound that fun right now. I told Todd last night, I just want to come home, crawl in bed and stare at the wall. Is that so wrong?

He says that’s maybe not such a good sign.

**********

Rumor has it we’re supposed to get snow again this weekend. I’m alittle sick of that, too.

**********

I think I need a vacation. We were invited to go to Hawaii with friends, but due to my stupid job and lack of vacation time, we had to pass.

I would settle for one of the islands for a couple of days. I’m not picky.

**********

Sorry I don't have more exciting stuff to share with you.

Blah.

I Can't Work Like This!

Saturday was the Duo film shoot.

Some of us were up at 6:15am because we were just too antsy and excited to sleep. However, I was not one of these people. I finally rose at 7:15am (on a SATURDAY) and demanded a Starbucks stop on the way to the studio.

Once all the gear was unloaded, I prepared bagels and coffee with Trish and watched as a plain ol' room was transformed into an artist's studio. I witnessed sound muffling tricks (blankets tacked to the ceiling), camera angles staged, actors getting their make-up, marks being taped to the floor, and TBFE yelling "action!"

It was all very exciting.

And, being the cut throat, attention starved, sleep-with-anyone-to-work-my-way-up-the-ladder-of-fame chick that I am, I was promoted from MBK (Master of the Bathroom Key) to Script Supervisor in a mere three hours.

Look at me, supervising.
And here's my honey, directing. With his rock star, albeit Longhorns, hand gestures.

(By the way, we got rid of that sweatshirt. It's an XXL and, as you can see, my baby ain't no XXL anymore. He's a svelte little XL. Look at those little hips!)

It was a really fun day, but it was also a very long day. It reminded me of recording D'Jever back in May of 2006. Sing for three minutes, wait around for 15 minutes. Sing for three minutes, wait around for 15 minutes. But you feel so cool just waiting around with your headphones on.

Anywho, we finally wrapped up around 5pm and, in quite the star fashion, we rewarded ourselves with food and drink at the Celtic Swell.

Then promptly crashed at 9pm.

Whee.

My New Babies

Aren't they divine?
And even better....they were $60 off. The color has been discontinued.

Life.Is.Good.

So Much To Think About

I have some downtime today so I’ve been perusing wedding gowns online. And my goodness, the questions that come to mind.

Do I want to look like a crack whore?
Do I want my boobs to hang out of the sides of the dress?
Do I want to wear feathers on my dress?
Do I want to wear feathers on my head?
Do I want to be able to fit into a bathroom stall?
Do I want to be able to walk?
Do I want to be able to breathe?
Do I want to be able to eat at the reception?
Do I want to look like a magnificent poof?
Do I want to look like I’m pregnant?
Do I want my dress to resemble a toga?
Do I want to look like frosting?
Do I want to look like I’m 12?
Do I want my ass to look like it is exploding in satin?
Do I want to gather small children in my six foot train as I pass by?
Do I want to my dress to resemble a doily?
Do I want to wear a choker?
Do I want that choker to be leather?
Do I want to look like the curtains we had in our house in 1984?

Whew.
And after scanning dress after dress after dress, I'm a little sick to my stomach. Need to take a break. All of them look like Cinderella now.

Ick.

And This Is Why I Shouldn’t Cook

I made dinner last night. Very rare.

But it was our nine month anniversary and we thought the kids were going to be at their uncle’s, so I said I’d make my man dinner and we’d crack open a bottle of wine and get all crazy like a couple of kidless youngsters.

Well, plans changed, so I made dinner for the family. No biggie, but cooking for the kids limits me more than just cooking for Todd. So, I decided rather than getting all kinds of creative, I would make a relatively easy dinner.

However.

I’m not good with nutrition. I don’t know which foods go together to help with digestion and which foods should be avoided with other foods. I just like food and I like a theme, so I put stuff together that I think works. Without thinking of the consequences.

So, dinner last night was red beans and rice, sausage, brussel sprouts (shut up, I love ‘em) and cornbread.

And as noted in the past, when I make dinner, by gawd, I make dinner. Complete with dessert (which was angel food cake, strawberries, vanilla ice cream, chocolate syrup and whipped cream).

[chirp, chirp]

Do I really need to tell you where this is going?

At 11:00 last night, TBFE had some stomach cramps that probably gave him a good indication of what women go through every month. There were some gurgles that startled both of us and a few moanings that took the shape of “ah gawd”.

I felt so bad. I apologized over and over and finally said, “Maybe we should just stick with you making dinner. Maybe I shouldn’t be allowed in the kitchen......”

Martha Stewart would be so ashamed of me.

Oddly enough, the kids love the red beans and rice and cornbread, and even had two helpings! Score for Rae-rae! They didn't care for the brussel sprouts, but that's okay. At least they tried them. I haven't heard how their stomachs are doing today.

Sigh.

Guess it's good thing I like to clean, huh?

“I Look Like Meringue”

- words that were uttered, by me, on Sunday as I finally squeezed my tush into some wedding dresses. Ten wedding dresses, to be exact.

And the range of emotions was exhausting.

joy – I’m getting married!
panic – I’m getting married!
giddiness – I finally get to put on these beautiful, albeit, heavy gowns!
fear – What if they don’t zip up? What if I look fat?
overwhelmed – I only have an hour to look through all of these?
flushed – Holy crap, how do I get out of this thing?! Is it hot in here?!

I’m not going to lie to you. There may have been tears at one point. Tears of happiness or tears of stress, I’m not sure.

The choosing part wasn’t very hard. I have a very particular style in mind, so I stuck to that. Well, until Kim pulled out a mermaid shaped dress without knowing it and I didn’t know it until I couldn’t get it up over my voluptuous child bearing hips. I was grunting in the dressing room and the little helper girl asked if everything was okay.

I said “I don’t think so. I think this one is broken.”
She took a peek and said, “Oh, that’s a mermaid style”.

I hollered to Kim that she was fired.

Other than that, Kim and Jamie did a great job of picking stuff out for me. Each time I’d come out of the dressing room, they had another one for me to try on.

However, at one point, early on, I came out and both of them were engrossed in a group of dresses near the mirrors. I walked over, climbed up on the little podium and stood there, hands on hips, ready for them to ooh and aah, but they didn’t even hear me.

Until I said, “Ladies! Focus!”

From that point on, as soon as I’d come out of the dressing room, I’d hear one of them say “Oh, she’s out! Let’s go!” Gotta keep my gals on their toes.

Despite my gloomy and blah mood, I did have fun. The mimosa beforehand helped alittle. And it’s such a surreal feeling to stand in front of a bunch of mirrors, in this huge, fluffy, sparkly dress. You really do feel like a princess. Even without any make up on and your wet hair up in a messy bun.

I’m looking forward to our next trip in a couple of weeks. I think I’ll have more fun this time. There won’t be a looming doctor’s appointment to worry about.

No Colposcopy For You!

So, I got all the way to the doctor's office, got down to that tiny sheet around my bare bottom, and Jamie (gawd bless her) was sitting next to me asking, "Ya doin' okay? Everything okay?"

Then the doctor came in, we started talking about my history and recent love of pap smears and she mentioned HPV and how it was responsible for 99% of all abnormal paps so we'll test for that and then........

Um. I thought you knew.

I've had two (count 'em - TWO) HPV screenings and BOTH were negative.

Negative.

Oh, she says. Well then. You don't need a colposcopy! I guess your GP was just being extra thorough.

Apparently, the two (count 'em - TWO) negative HPV screens takes away any concern there may be. So, yes, abnormal results, but no, nothing to worry about.

And no snipping of the cervix cells. Yay!

She offered to take a peek at my cervix and even do yet another pap if I wanted, but I was all papped out so I said no thanks. I'm all good.

We'll wait until my next annual in October (be sure to remind me if I don't blog about it by about October 20th), and if that one comes back abnormal, well we might think about a colposcopy. But until then, no need to stress.

Well, okay fine.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled blog.

In Case You're Interested In My Cervix

So, I’ve been a bit distracted the last few days, which is why I haven’t written.

The things that are on my mind, I don’t much feel like writing about. But since this blog has always been, primarily, to keep my friends and family in the know, regardless of how personal it may be (see: boob scare post of 2006), I figured I should let you in on the most recent stress in Rae-rae’s life (aside from wedding dresses).

[WARNING-Frequent use of the word “pap” coming up]

In October, I had my annual “well woman” exam. And the pap came back abnormal. Huh. No biggie. Could be a number of reasons. It happens.

Well, it’s never happened to me.

My doctor wasn’t alarmed, but wanted to do a follow up exam in January, just to double-check.

And pap number two was abnormal.

[As a side note, it seems that these doctor's appointments, and my mention of them, is what caused some people to think I was pregnant. Which is very funny.]

Again, not necessarily a horrible thing. It’s hard to tell. Lots of women have abnormal paps. Except me. This is all new. And since it’s out of the blue, my doctor (a GP) referred me to a Bonafied Gynecologist, for her recommendation.

So this afternoon I’m going in for a colposcopy.

Not a colonoscopy. I’d actually prefer that right now. Because a colposcopy doesn’t just go in and glance around while you’re on happy juice. A colposcopy looks around, then may actually snip cells from the cervix, while you are stone cold sober.

That’s right - everyone cross their legs now.

I’m not going to link to it, because I don’t think anyone really wants to read about all of the details. And if you do, that’s what Google is for

Now, as for my mental health regarding all of this, I’m not so concerned about the actual diagnosis. That’s not something I can control and whatever the outcome, it is what it is. We’ll jump off that bridge when we come to it and do what we have to do. Or not. Whatever.

The part I am absolutely freaking about it is the procedure. The colposcopy. I don’t mind the annual exams so much. My doctor is fantastic – in and out in under two minutes. Love her. But this exam is going to take longer. And I don’t know how much longer; I can’t find that information anywhere. I just know it’s hard enough to “relax” for the two minutes I need to in order for my doctor to do what she’s gotta do. I’m stressed about being stressed and trying to “relax” for a longer period of time while “things” are “going on” (like how I simplify this stuff for you?).

Luckily, my Best Lady, Jamie will be with me. I’ve given her props before and depending on how much of a pain in the ass I am this afternoon, she may get her Props II post later this week. Once I’m out of the fetal position and can type again.

Anywho.
That’s what’s going on with me.

Well, I also tried on wedding dresses yesterday.
But that should be a different post.

I'm Really Not Materialistic

I never posted a picture of my engagement ring on the blog because I didn't want people to think "Oh, she's all about the bling".

But when people ask to see it, and I'm hesitant because I don't want Todd to think I'm a shallow gold (er....um platinum) digger, The Best Fiancé Ever will say "You better show it off! I spent a lot of money AND I designed it!"

And since I'll never see some of you face to face, and I know you're curious, here's a couple of pics for you.

(This past weekend, playing with the camera, cropped so you can't see that I'm actually holding my boob.)

(Day of the engagement, trying to get a good shot for my mom.)

There's one, large diamond on top, then two smaller diamonds, one on each side. Those small diamonds belonged to Todd's great great aunt. Todd's sister-in-law also has family diamonds in her ring. We're all about family. And the Celtic knot work goes all the way around the ring.

I'll admit, I was nervous when Todd mentioned he was designing the ring himself. We had been sending pictures back and forth as early as August, so he had an idea of what I liked, but sometimes we don't agree on styles and patterns.

And, honestly, when he proposed, I completely forgot there was a ring. I said yes and just stood there and hugged him. Then he nudged me with the box, and held the ring up and I literally gasped.

It was perfect. I could not have picked out a more perfect piece of jewelry. It's dainty, it looks antique and it's sparkly. It has character and personality. It's unique and I know that no one else has a ring like this.

So there ya go.

My Latest Soap Opera

I was in the kitchen this morning, preparing my oatmeal, and a co-worker walked in. I don't know her name, but we're friendly and chat when we both happen to be in the kitchen at the same time. She also compliments my cube when I decorate it.

This morning, she told me that she asked my fellow buyer and cube neighbor, if I was Irish. He wearily replied, "I think so" with a sigh. The woman said, "I can't wait to see what she does for St. Patrick's Day!"

This is the same fellow buyer who scowled at my Christmas decorations and threatened to remove my Valentine's Day decorations. All with a slight grin, as if he were joking, but I don't think he was. I think he genuinely hates decorating.

Hmm.
It's unfortunate that he sits next to me.

In a shocking twist, it was my SUPERVISOR who actually took down my heart paper garland, in a fit of humorous Valentine's Day disgust. Imagine her surprise when she walked through the office later that day, only to find that the Valentine's Day garland she had stolen had MAGICALLY REAPPEARED!

Ha!
I bought two. Just in case a tragic event like this should transpire.
Do not mess with my decorations. I mean it.

However, I really love my group, so I have compromised with Mr. Cranky Non-Decorating Co-Worker and Ms. I Have No Holiday Spirit. I have agreed to only decorate on St. Patrick's Day proper. I see now that I may have pushed them a little too far with four days of red hearts and frilly garland.

If it weren't for this kind of drama, my life would be so boring.

Lazy Sunday

This is what happens on days when we have nothing on the calendar.

And this is how far I can take it now because I have a LABEL MAKER.

I didn't do all of the files. Had to bring myself to a stop. Got things to do.

The kids each have an overnight, so TBFE and I are going to see Lisa Hannigan at the Triple Door, after a long, leisurely dinner at Wild Ginger. Yum.

Happy Valentine's Day

Or, Happy VD day, as my friend used to say, completely by accident because she was a dork.

(Just a Few) Random Thoughts

I find myself right clicking on pictures of bouquets I like or hairstyles I like and saving them in my Wedding folder. Quick and easy way to save and organize ideas.

Take that, Martha Stewart.

**********

Office Max is pissing me off (watch their new commercial). I had written an entire post dedicated to how much they’re pissing me off, but let me just say this:

Just because I’m a woman doesn’t mean I’m going to throw all logic to the wind and buy your $40 silver stapler or your $.99 baroque file folders. Just because you’ve revamped your image to include a bazillion flowers and pretty colors does not mean I’m going to be suckered into spending more money than I should just so my office looks all pretty. Yes, you’ve discovered that 80% of your customers are women, but holy crap, overdo it much? The two men I work with are as offended as I am.

Now, that said, the shoes that the woman is wearing in the advertisement that came today are FANTABULOUS. I don’t give a shit about your Candy Apple Red 4WRK paper shredder, but I need to know where I can buy those shoes.

**********

I still haven’t tried on any wedding dresses. Isn’t that funny? You would think the first thing I would have done after getting engaged was go try on the big frilly dresses. But no. Maybe I’ve been too busy. Maybe I think I’m fat. Maybe I’m scared that it will be harder than I think and I’ll get discouraged.

Maybe I’ll make an appointment for next weekend. Maybe.

**********

I decorated my cube for Valentine’s Day. It’s not that I love Valentine’s Day so much, it’s really just to irk my co-workers who made a fuss when I decorated for Christmas. And because they’ve made their feelings known, I will be decorating for St Patrick’s Day and Easter and maybe even Memorial Day. So there.


Last year, I wore black (bad year and all) and I found a black hat complete with veil on my desk when I arrived to work. I know who left it. He's a funny guy.

So I wore it all day.


I live to entertain my co-workers.

Christmas Never Ends!

I’m still trying to get caught up on all of the blogs I read, after missing a few weeks back in January, so I just noticed that Creth, of Acid Indignation, tagged me on the big Christmas meme that went around this year. This, after Lucy tagged me and I completely missed it. (Apparently, so did Todd, as it took two taggings to get him to do this.)

I feel so loved and popular. Thanks guys.

Here we go (two months late, and because I have nothing else to share with you right now). And my apologies, Stephen. I know how you feel about dragging this Christmas crap out.

1. Egg nog or hot chocolate?
Hot chocolate. Just reading the words “egg nog” makes me wanna barf.

2. Does Santa wrap presents or just sit them under the tree?
Santa leaves them unwrapped, under the tree. Everyone else wraps them. That’s the best part of waking up Christmas morning. The new stuff that Santa leaves!

3. Colored lights on tree/house or white?
White. Although I did multi in '07 just because I had them and they were very pretty on the tree.

4. Do you hang mistletoe?
No. Where does one find mistletoe? Besides at the florist shop at Christmas?

5. When do you put your decorations up?
Day after Thanksgiving.

6. What is your favorite holiday dish (excluding dessert)?
We never really had a holiday dish. Other than the green bean casserole with the French’s onions on top. I think that was only for turkey day, though.

7. Favorite holiday memory as a child?
Wow. I honestly can’t think of one. Christmases were always exciting and fun in my house. Maybe it’s not that I can’t think of one. Maybe it’s that they were all my favorite.

8. When and how did you learn the truth about Santa?
What do you mean?

9. Do you open a gift on Christmas Eve?
My folks and I used to open one gift on Christmas Eve. Then it turned into however many we wanted, which turned into opening them as they arrived in the mail in the weeks leading up to Christmas. We’re all about instant gratification.

10. How do you decorate your Christmas tree?
Uh, by hand? Is there a special contraption out there that will do it for me?
We used to lights, garland and ornaments. Since I’ve been having my own tree, I leave off the garland.

11. Snow! Love it or dread it?
Loved it before Dec 08. Now, not so much. It’s pretty for the first day, then it’s just a pain in the ass.

12. Can you ice skate?
Yep. And do one of those skate on one leg while the other one is out behind you moves. What’s that called? Google is no help to me.

13. Do you remember your favorite gift?
Oh, there were so many. The Pizza Hut playdoh factory (when I was 17), the trampoline (when I was 8), the Swatch watch my daddy gave me.

14. What's the most important thing about the holidays for you?
Giving presents. I love a reason to buy for people.

15. What is your favorite holiday dessert?
Yes.

16. What is your favorite holiday tradition?
It used to be driving around with my mom, looking at lights in the neighborhood. I’m not sure if Todd and I have any traditions just yet. Seeing as how we just spent our first Christmas together.

17. What tops your tree?
Now, the tree is too tall for a topper. But in the past, my family had one of those cheesy, tinsely, multi-colored light things that blinks.

18. Which do you prefer - giving or receiving?
Giving. But like receiving a lot, too.
(You have no idea how long it took me to answer this question. My mind is absolutely filthy.)

19. What is your favorite Christmas song?
Ack. Just one? “Fairytale in New York” by the Pogues. “Baby, Please Come Home” by U2. “Blue Christmas” by Elvis.

20. Candy Canes! Yuck or Yum?
Yuck. They get old after a couple of licks.
Yeah, I said it. Licks.
(See? Filthy.)

21. What do you want for Christmas?
Peace and love.
And an engagement ring.
Oh wait!! I already got that!!

Okay. Christmas is officially over now.
I mean it.

The Organizer

While I'm waiting for TBFE to finish up killin' aliens (whatever the hell they are), I thought I would share with you my Holy-Crap-I'm-Actually-Getting-Married (HCIAGM?) wedding organizer.


As a bonus, you get a photo of Elvis, judging my labeling job. The labels are venue, catering, bride's attire, groom's attire, reception, cake, party's attire, invitations and honeymoon. I still have a couple of empty pockets, too. Room to expand.

There's a little pull out flap too (that black thing in the front) that has some zippered pockets (for receipts?) and a flat writing surface. Jamie purchased a few of these organizer thingies a while back and didn't use a couple, so she gave them to me. The other one is my magazine project organizer.

Okay, TBFE is finished killing things and has logged out.
Gotta go be mushy.......

Conditioning

I’m sitting at my desk (taking one of my required breaks, thankyouverymuch) and I just had the odd sensation that I need to fasten my seatbelt. I guess feel a little out of control in my ergonomic desk chair. Feel like I need to be buckled in.

Huh.

That's all.

so....sleepy.....

What is up with today?
The alarm went off at 6:00am. Like normal. And I finally crawled out of bed at 7:15am. I just cannot get moving.

Could be that my sinuses were clogged all night and I never sleep well when I have to breathe through my mouth.

Could be that I was awakened a few times in the night by an unusually active household.

Could be the memorial service we went to yesterday afternoon drained me more than I thought it would. Lots of friends and memories from the past, but I'm thankful that I was included.

Whatever the reason, I am counting down the minutes until I can get back into bed. I hate days like this. It's a slippery slope.

Oh, you said it, kitty cat.
You said it.

Update on the Retirees

Oh, they’re having the time of their lives up there in the hills. Just look at how much fun Dad’s having.

Bet Florida ain't lookin' so bad, is it, Ma?

Weekend Update

My goodness, where does the time go? Seems like it was just Friday, and I was looking forward to relaxing over the weekend. Yeah. It never works out that way.

Friday night was movies with Trish and Dan and pizza. And westerns. Fun stuff. The most relaxing portion of the weekend.

Saturday, we Downings-n-Marsh were all very productive. We cleaned out the carport and took a truckload of stuff to the dump. Kayleigh swept out the carport and Tyler broke down cardboard boxes for recycling. It was a fun family project and the result is no more crap for the rats to hide in! Yay!

After cleaning ourselves up, Kayleigh headed over to a friend’s house for an overnight and Todd and I headed to Canada. Uh, I mean Lynnwood. Which is almost to Canada.

Todd shot some footage of Kyle Steven’s performance at the Comic Stop and afterwards, we had dinner, then attended my first Chinese New Year party. I am a rabbit. That’s my Chinese sign. I like it. I like bunnies. This however, is the year of the Ox. I’m not sure what that means for us rabbits. I met lots of new people, and I think I made my man proud in front of his friends. Especially when I talked about my boobs. When in doubt, talk about yer boobs.

Since the party was in Lynnwood, and it didn’t let out until around midnight, we were up very late. But Todd still got up early Sunday morning to have coffee with his friend, while I slept in, drooling and dreaming until my phone rang and woke me up. Then I got myself together and walked over to my new friend Stephanie’s house so that I could offer up my two cents on decorating ideas for our shopping trip. We weren’t very productive in the shopping department, but it was nice to have some coffee and girl time. She came home with three adhesive back hooks. At least her daughter can hang her coats up now.

By that afternoon, I was quite pooped, so Todd fixed nachos and we curled up on the couch to watch the Un-SuperBowl. Although, it was pretty super. Would have been superer if the Cardinals had won, but oh well. They gave the Steelers (although, some Seahawks fans still tend to say Stealers) a run for their money and that’s better than we all expected.

And after the game I broke out all of my wedding notes and brochures and ripped pages, along with my BRAND NEW LABEL MAKER and spent the next two hours organizing my papers and labeling my Holy-Crap-I’m-Actually-Getting-Married wedding binder while sprawling all over the bed and watching The Office.

Yes, that’s my idea of a great night.

And now I think I have a sinus infection.

My head hurts, my cheeks hurt, my teeth hurt. Ow. I’ve been itching like crazy and it occurs to me that it’s because I’ve been loading up on Sudafed for the past week. My sinuses tend to clog up right as we lay down to go to bed, so I've been popping a Sudafed nightly. Which dries me out. Which makes me itch. At least it’s not lice. But it does indicate a problem of some sort.

(No, not a drug problem. I can stop anytime I want. Really.)

Thankfully, I have yet another doctor’s appointment* this week, so maybe he can prescribe an antibiotic or something to clear it up.

I think you’re all caught up now.



*Not to worry. This appointment is just to represcribe my massages. No biggie.

$3,524.79

That’s how much damage that little ol’ rat caused.
Damn rat.

I got Ruby back from the shop on Friday. And she’s filthy. And it smells like someone spilled beer in her.

But otherwise, she’s a happy girl. And I am very happy to have her back.

When I dropped of the rental beast at Enterprise on Friday, the very chipper sales lady asked me if everything was to my liking. My reply was:

“I hate that car”.

She looked shocked and started to stammer, “Oh, well, I’m….I’m so sorry you weren’t completely satisfied….um….satisfied with your….um…”

I cut her off and said it was nothing personal. It’s just that that car is the absolute worse car on the planet. Really.

But it only cost me $26 out of pocket, so I really shouldn’t complain.

Anywho.
Ruby is back, The Beast is gone, the rat is dead and hopefully things will return to normal around here.

Week of Cancer

Two of my very favorite people each lost a parent to cancer this week.

And it hurts.

To see their pain and feel their grief is tough. I want to support and help and make it all better, but that’s not possible. So, I offer up hugs and wine and a comfy couch to hang out on for an evening, with a promise to not talk about the obvious. It’s the best I can do for them right now.

Slow Day

I had a thought
So I started to write
Now the thought is gone
Just like my mind

I hate the rental car
I miss my Ruby
And I need more sleep
More uninterrupted sleep

Thought came back!
We booked a venue
A wedding in November
Ah, we love the rain

We also spoke to caterers
And ate yummy food
And got some sticker shock
But it’s totally worth it

Nine tabs now
Wedding spreadsheet is huge
As is wedding binder
I need a label maker

It’s been a busy week
It will be a busy weekend
SuperBowl on Sunday!
Hopefully I won’t cry this year

That is all

Vengeance Is Mine!

Actually, it’s Todd’s, because he set out the rat traps. And within three hours, he caught one. Little bastard.

I do have a hard time with killing the rats. They’re just trying to survive like everyone else, and if I could reason with them, I would. But I can’t, and they’re causing thousands of dollars worth of damage, so they must be terminated. At least these traps are quick and bloodless.

Kayleigh wanted to set up a cozy little home for them in the back corner of the yard so they wouldn’t have to climb up in the cars to keep warm. That’s why I love her. She cares about the little disease infested rodents. We still said no. Once they made a home there, they’d tell all their little disease infested friends about the really cool hostel they found. And we just can’t have a new rat colony living in our backyard.

On a related topic, here’s the rental car I’m driving.

I asked for the smallest and cheapest car they had.

I feel like a pimp in this thing. It’s a two door, and because the car is so long, the doors are huge and winglike. I literally have to use my foot to push the driver’s side door open. But at least my bitches won’t have any trouble gettin’ in the backseat. Yo.

It is 179.8 inches long. Ruby is 177.9 inches long. Not a big difference, but big enough so that it took me 10 minutes to park in the garage this morning. Todd calls it The Beast.

But it’s got an iPod port!

And I got to drive it in the snow this morning! Because suddenly I live in the arctic where it snows on a regular basis!

WTF?

Par-Tays

I know that TBFE has mentioned our weekend on his post, but I like the throw my $.02 in as well. I dub this weekend "How Did I Do This When I Was 24?".

Friday night was my friend Val's bachelorette party. There was dinner at Julia's on Capitol Hill to start, then dancing at Neighbors, a popular gay dance club. Which is the best place for a group of 10 inebriated ladies to go dancing. Less pressure. No one was interested in us (except for some weirdo who seemed to be interested in anyone who would make eye contact with him). I shook my groove thing for a little while, then I'd sit and watch the gals, then maybe dance a little more. I remember how my knees hurt last year after going out with Rachelle and Val, and I knew I had a big party to host on Saturday night, so I took it easy.

Got home late, stayed up even later, crashed around 2am.

Todd and I were up early on Saturday to shop for the party. Ran around til about 2pm, picked up a little around the house, then actually had some downtime before the deluge of people arrived around 7pm.

Lots o' photos here.

Now, if you've ever been to a party that I've hosted or co-hosted, you know that I appear stressed. I'm really not. I just tend to get a little overwhelmed in the beginning when everyone is arriving faster than I can greet/meet them. At one point, I had my hands full of coats, frantically trying to figure out how to fit them in the closet, when the doorbell rang. Meaning more coats to try and hang. A couple of my friends had been watching me and when the doorbell rang, one asked, "Howya doin' there, Raechelle?"

But once the initial rush of guests is finished, I mingle like a mad woman. As does Todd. In looking back at our photos from the night (thank you, Kayleigh, our budding photographer) I noticed there isn't one picture of me and Todd together. Huh.

Anyway, I met a lot of new people, saw a lot of old friends and actually remembered to eat something in the midst so I wasn't completely out of it come midnight.

And what's a nice byproduct of parties?

Holy crap, anyone wanna come over for a drink?

My Baby Meter

My baby meter seems to be a hot topic of discussion, now that Todd and I are officially engaged.

More specifically, many people are asking "When are you going to get pregnant!?"

(Or most recently, "Are you pregnant?!" To them, I say - Uh, you obviously have not seen me this weekend - bachelorette party (one raspberry lemon drop and three jack-n-cokes) and engagement party (xxx number of glasses of wine, champagne and port)).

So, it looks like I should address the topic point blank.

Todd and I do not plan to have any babies.

Yes, my baby meter was running on high in the months before we met, but when Todd and I started dating, a funny thing happened. I got the family I had been wanting. I have my little girl who wants my help with girly stuff, I have my teenage boy who headbutts me but I think secretly likes it when I put my foot down.

I do not need to give birth to a baby. I still love the babies. Got my baby fix Saturday night at the party and believe that, under the influence, I offered to babysit any freakin' time they needed. But, really. I'm good now. I have my family. And in a mere six years, Kayleigh will be graduating high school and leavin' the nest. The thought of starting from square one and raising a baby does not sound appealing to me anymore. Raising two half grown kids is exhausting enough.

So, now we can focus on the important stuff.
Hows about these shoes?

Die Rats Die

So, I still don't have Ruby back.

I called this morning and was told the computer needs to be replaced. Apparently, it shorted out when I started the car up, so State Farm needs to approve the quote, a new computer needs to be ordered and the car needs to be towed up to the dealership so they can program it.

Fantastic.

At least three or four more days.

I'm getting a rental car today. I'm tired of being dependant on others, so I'll suck it up. At least insurance pays for 80%.

Sigh.

Add that to my already upset stomach and the fact that I have yet another female doctor's appointment this afternoon and you have a very glum Raechelle.

Random Thoughts

TBFE is not alone when he says it's been a shitty week. Something is outta whack and I'm about sick of it. Dinner and dancing tonight with a bunch gals may be just what I need to get back on track.

**********

Speaking of TBFE, he is now feeding me vitamins. Kayleigh witness this last week and said to me, "He spoils you."

Yes, he does.

And the vitamins he feeds me turn my pee neon yellow. Apparently, that's normal.

**********

The smell of Top Raman noodles, chicken flavor, remind me of daytime TV. Must have eaten these alot when I was home during the summer.

Yes, I'm still eating Top Raman for lunch. Six for $1. I'm on a budget.

**********

Ruby is STILL in the shop and I miss her terribly. The mechanic tells me that replacing the cables is tedious work and he's been careful and thorough. I believe him. He's also going to go ahead and replace the rear brake pads. I made some calls, chatted on some car forums and came to the conclusion that the quick wear of the brake pads may not be a warranty issue. It may just be a cheap brake pads/city driving/using my parking brake alot issue.

Whatever. I don't have the energy to care at this point.

But I owe my co-worker Cathi many drinks for carting me to and from work all week. She's a lifesaver.

**********

Our housewarming/now engagement party redux is tomorrow night. Damn Snowpocalypse '08. We did have five people show up at the originally scheduled party last month. They all lived within a mile of us. Hopefully there will be no weather related catastrophes tomorrow.

And hopefully I will be a bit more chipper.

**********

My Holy-Crap-I'm-Actually-Getting-Married wedding spreadsheet now has eight tabs. Venue, caterer, guests, vendors, lodging, questions to ask, oot guests and misc. There's pretty colors, too.

Wedding planner? I don't need no stinkin' wedding planner!

**********

I filled out the paperwork for a passport.
No, I don't have one.

Now I just need to get the photo taken (while I am blemish free) and take it to the post office. Apparently, you can get your passport there.

**********

The Superbowl is coming up and I'm so sad that I don't care. But I'll root for the Cardinals. Cause....well, you know why.

The Cube Life

As you know, I work in a cube now. It’s quite an adjustment. I’m aware that my neighbors can overhear my phone conversations. And the problem isn’t that I make a lot of personal calls while at work, maybe a couple a week (personal admin stuff), it’s that I’m afraid I’m going to say something wrong when I’m ordering something from a vendor (“Yeah, well….your prices SUCK!”) and one of my co-buyers will correct me. I fear being corrected.

And here’s why.

When I was 23, I was teaching ballroom dancing in Houston. How does one get into teaching ballroom dancing?

Slight tangent:
My then boyfriend Matt, my buddy Bob and I were hanging out at our local bar, the Vapor Room. Oh, I have so many stories from the Vapor Room. Anyway, one particular night, there were two or three dance instructors there, teaching swing dancing. This was at the height of the swing craze and the Ernie Savage Revival, a big band, was playing. I guess the manager of the Vapor Room thought having swing lessons would be a cool and profitable idea. And it was. Bob and I got up with group, boys on one side, girls on the other, and learned the basic rock step and turn. I say woohoo!

Well, Bob and I met while dancing at another club, so we were no newbies. We started improvising and Bob starting throwing a kick in there and one of the instructors eventually came over and asked if we’d ever thought about teaching dance. We were dumbfounded. Really? Teach?

We ended up going to the studio to talk with the manager and find out the details. Bob quickly declined when the manager told him he was going to have to cut his hair. Bob’s hair was down to his waist and very red. Dancing wasn’t worth it.

I, however, had nothing else going on. I was going to the University of Houston in the mornings, working at Coldwell Banker as a receptionist in the afternoons and drinking and partying at night. So, my schedule was open.

I continued to go to school in the morning (when I actually got up and went to school) and working in the afternoon (I’m very responsible. Never missed work. Even with the worst of hangovers) and then I’d go to the studio after work and take all of the classes and work with the other instructors to learn the dances and how to break them down and teach them.

And I’ll let a secret out of the bag.

Dance instructors have to start somewhere. Most of them have no idea how to foxtrot or tango when they start. So they take the classes and learn when they aren’t teaching. If you’ve ever taken dance lessons, chances are you’ve had a new teacher who learned that traveling box step mere minutes before you arrived for your lesson. It only takes a few months to get up to speed, but those first few weeks of teaching are stressful.

And here’s the example of why I hate people overhearing me.

I was in my third week of teaching dance. It was around 4pm so the studio was pretty empty as most students didn’t come in until after work. I was teaching my surgeon, who was brand spankin’ new, a foxtrot step. I forget what the step was, but I had just learned it the day before, when the manager was teaching all of us instructors some fancy moves. So, I was all pleased with myself, showing him this new step, talking very confidently because I had JUST learned it and I remembered every detail. And I taught it very well. The surgeon caught on quickly and by the end of his lesson, he had it down.

During his hour long lesson, the other instructors were practicing with each other over on the other side of the room. They were very good at congratulating the surgeon when he did well, but they never corrected me. They never threw in any tips or suggestions on how to perform this move. They just observed and gave praise.

After the surgeon had left, the other instructors erupted in laughter. I, being the newbie that I was, didn’t get the joke. I did good! The surgeon did good! Just what was so funny?

They told me I had taught the step very well, and they weren’t laughing at my ability. They were laughing because that step I had just taught my brand spankin’ new student was a Silver level step.

My surgeon was only at the Bronze level.
The first level.

The steps we had been learning with the manager of the studio the day before were advanced steps. For advanced students. And for teachers.

So now I had this student who know four steps in the foxtrot and one of them was a Silver step, which was going to bite him in the ass at the Friday night student dance party. He was going to pull this fancy move on another Bronze level student and she wasn’t going to know what the hell to do. Thus, making me look like I didn’t know what I was doing.

Fantastic.

At the surgeon’s next lesson, I had to fess up and apologize. I told him that I had gotten carried away because he was doing so well, and had inadvertently taught him an advanced step. He didn’t know enough to think I was an idiot; he just thought I was THAT good. And he felt very special that I had taught him a Silver step.

Now, when I’m on the phone with a vendor, I always expect one of the other buyers to listen patiently while I completely break all of the buyer rules and then erupt into laughter when I get off the phone, and tell me, “Raechelle! You can’t promise to bake the vendor cookies! That’s a conflict of interest! Sheesh!!”

So far this hasn’t happened.
But the fear is still there.

Oh, Happy Day

That's right.
See ya, George!

Or how about, get the hell out of here?

Inauguration Day. A day that normally involves a lot of tears, a lot of drinking (for the wrong the reasons) and research on how to defect to another country.

But not this year. No sir.
It is a great day.

Although, this photo makes me want to puke.




That is WAY too many freakin' people. Cyn is there today. She's got to be just batshit crazy.

I was very happy watching President Obama's speech from the comfort of my cube. I bet it was much warmer in here, too.

Weekend Update

Quite the busy weekend here in Raechelle-land.

Friday night was our normal, routine movie night. And it was great. Trish and Dan came over, we had spaghetti, watched Wall-E. My nerves were frayed for some reason, but other than that, a lovely evening.

Saturday morning, Todd and I got up early and toured the Sanctuary at Admiral, a venue for the wedding. And we absolutely fell in love with it the moment we walked in the door. We had every intention of shopping around, but after getting an email with information about another location and looking at a couple of other websites, we decided the Sanctuary is exactly what we want. So there. Done deal.

Later that afternoon was shopping with Christmas gift cards. I bought four new bras. Crazy, I know. But those babies are $30 a piece, so what better way to spend free money?

Saturday night, Kayleigh went to a sleepover, Tyler had a friend stay over, so Todd and I actually got to watch TV, on the big screen ALL NIGHT. We watched Get Smart, too, which was actually very entertaining.

Sunday morning, Todd went off for coffee and I made the boys french toast while tidying up and doing laundry. I'm so domestic. Then I headed out to meet Jamie for sushi and shopping.

But my plan was foiled.

Did you know that rats eat car cables? I knew this, as Todd had to have his spark plug cables replaced a few months ago. But just like everything else, you think "Oh, that'll never happen to me."

Ruby will tell you differently.

When I got in my car Sunday afternoon, it sputtered. A lot. I called Todd out to get his opinion, and he said, yes, it seems the rats have gotten to your car. Crap. Of which there was a lot under my car, another indicator that rodents were involved.

So, I called Jamie and asked her just how much she loved me and how badly she wanted to see me. She's a good friend, so she drove down, picked me up, and we had lunch at the Blue C in Southcenter (rather than the U Village, like our original plan) and shopped around for a bit. Plan = salvaged.

I took Ruby to the nearest Goodyear center Monday morning (at 8:00am ON A HOLIDAY!) then Todd treated me to breakfast afterwards. Because I was sad and I missed my car (and the money I was going to have to spend) already.

After breakfast, back home to clean up and head to Macy's to spend more free money on some new bedding. But first, a call from Goodyear.

And it was bad.

The rats had apparently not only eaten through a spark plug cable, but also my fuel injector cable. An $1100 part. That requires ("to start with") four hours of labor.

Shoot.Me.

After the initial panic set in, I called State Farm to tell them the situation. Bobbi said she's heard of this before, and yes, it's covered under my comprehensive. Big.Fat.Whew.

But now, a second issue. If you remember, I mentioned a while back that my rear brakes needed replacing. They were down to 30%. Well, now they're down to a ridiculous percent and it's looking like it's a warranty issue. The guy at Goodyear said I have 16,000 miles on my car and my rear brakes should not be that low.

So I've got that on plate as well. Good times.

We did, however, accomplish our mission of new bedding, after sitting on the floor at Macy's for 30 minutes talking about what we liked and didn't. We went from one end of the spectrum (formal, damask) to the other end (casual, rustic). And then we went to Bed, Bath & Beyond and bought a quilt we had noticed a while back. It's got the blue of the carpet and the tan/brown of the walls, and a little red to boot. Perfect!

Sunday evening was dinner and a movie - Southland Tales. Oy. Have you seen Donnie Darko? It's from the same guy, Richard Kelly, which means it's just as weird. The best scenes were the ones with The Rock, swear to gawd. And Justin Timberlake. Yes, I know how that sounds, but Dwayne Johnson (aka The Rock - one of mom's many boyfriends) is hysterical and Justin Timberlake is flat out creepy. And sad. Have you ever seen him on Saturday Night Live? Oh.My.Gawd. He is fantastic.

Okay, I'm starting to sound like a 13 year old girl now, so I'll just say, the movie has some good scenes. But someone also gets shot in the eye, so if you're squeamish about those kinds of things, skip it.

Now you're all caught up.

Cuteness - You're Doing It Wrong

Kayleigh does not appear to like the red blow that I tied in her hair.
Hmph.

The Great Migration

You've been waiting so patiently.....
Okay, here we go!

On December 29, at 1:00am, I flew to Houston. And I somehow, magically got upgraded to FIRST CLASS. I thought I wasn't even going to be able to board, but the ticketing agent finally gave back my boarding pass and whadya know - my new seat was 1B. Right on.

I arrived in Houston, was picked up by Dad, fed bacon by Mom and my other-mother Mary, then passed out for three hours while they did the last minute packing. Awoke, showered and prepared for the godparents and an early dinner.

[The Moms]

[The Dads]

I'm not as upset as I look. There were three different cameras going off. The moms were trying to blind us.

Went to bed early to prepare for the movers early the next morning, but fate had other ideas. I started on the couch, until mom got up to get on her heating pad (in the recliner in the living room). That woke me, but then I started hearing the freakin' grandfather clock gong every fifteen minutes (also in the living room). Shoot.Me. So I went and climbed in on mom's side of the bed (it's a big bed - dad was nowhere near me. Honest.) but dad snores loud enough to make the walls shiver, so after tolerating that for 30 minutes, I went to the quietest room I could think of. Mom and dad's walk in closet. I laid on the floor with a pillow, shut the door and wrapped mom's robe around me. I was asleep within minutes.

Until mom woke me by flinging open the door in a panic because no one could find me at 8am.

Anywho!

The semi-truck came, loaded everything that wasn't loaded in mom's car or dad's truck, and after five hours, drove away. During the load, however, Goober escaped from his kennel and the bathroom, so we were feverishly looking for him and determined not to leave until he came home.

Which he did, as soon as the truck took off. Big whew.

We shipped out at 3:00pm, each vehicle quipped with, among many other things, walkie talkies.

[Now would be a good time to go refill your coffee or pee. Go ahead. I'll wait.]

Around 6:00pm on Dec 29, we arrived in Lake Charles, Louisiana. Where we found a motel and curled up for the night while my other-mother Mary took off on her own and did a little gambling.

Up bright and early the next morning. Free breakfast in the dining room, and off we went!

Tuesday morning, we headed toward Birmingham, Alabama, stopping frequently to tinkle and eat. It was a no rush kind of drive. Except I had the pedal to the metal and cruised along smoothly at 75 the whole way. Mom offered to drive a few times, but I said no. She was now retired and deserved to be chauffeured like the old broad that she is. She knows I say this out of love.

Stopped outside of Birmingham and stayed at the Jameson Inn. Because it had a Starbucks beside it. Mom splurged and go me and Mary our own rooms. On our way back from dinner, I came across a stray kitty. He was crying and he was lovey and I couldn't bear to just leave him out in the parking lot.

Until the hives started.

Then he was on his own.

Up bright and early Wednesday morning (New Year's Eve!), breakfast at the Kettle (cheaper than sin!), cruise control set on 75. Oh, I kid. I don't use cruise control. I like the power.

Drive, drive, stop-n-pee, drive, stop-for-gas, drive, drive, Shoney's, drive, drive.....

Lexington, Kentucky.
Another Jameson Inn.
No stray kitties this time.
But there's a Starbucks!!

We have dinner, at which I sent all parents into a crying/laughing fit by making a scene in Ryan's Steakhouse by acting like a twelve year old because I really wanted ice cream for dessert, but they were all done and just sitting there waiting for me so I felt the pressure to get the hell out of there so I just got a couple of cookies and, by gawd, I let them know I was not happy about it. People stared. I was pleased.

Dropped the parents off at the hotel, cruised down to Liquor World (which was insanely packed), cruised across the street to the Liquor....Barn? to pick up a bottle of champagne. Korbel, but still.....It was New Year's Eve and it is unacceptable to not drink champagne, even if I was alone in my own hotel room, watching Countdown with Keith Olbermann , listening to the big party next door and talking (slurring) to my fiancé on the phone. Unacceptable.

I downed about half the bottle.


Mission accomplished.

Up bright and early, breakfast at the free buffet downstairs, big ass latte from Starbucks and off we go!

[Mary and Mom, in their matching casino sweatshirts.]

[Note of funny – we passed through Jellico Tennessee. Jellico. Say it with a thick twang. Then suddenly become the PR rep of Jellico and talk about how people need to come to Jellico because they have the THE BEST jelly in the land in Jellico. Swear to gawd! Gotta do it with a twang, though. Trust me. My mother will laugh for a half an hour. Totally worth it.]

Okay. Home stretch.

We crossed into West Virginia and the walkie talkie beeped. It was Dad singing "Country Roads".

[From the Barbour Democrat, the local newspaper]

We arrived at Pisswilly Ranch at 4:00 on January 1, 2009. Happy New Year, indeed.

Except....

For the mud. Oh gawd. The mud!

I wish I had gotten a picture of the mud. You can see how angry it made the Scotsman. He punched the mud in the face. Bad mud!!

He's very good at punching things in the face.

Anyway.

We arrived to a new home that had no furniture, no water, no phone, no TV and no internet. Oh, and no cell phone reception unless you drive about two miles up to the top of the hill.

The next day (after a four day drive) I made the three hour trip to Pittsburgh to pick up my sweetie.

[This is the part you’re REALLY interested in, isn’t it?]
[Do you need another break first?]

Todd’s flight arrived around 5:00pm, so that put us back in Belington around 9:00pm, after stopping at my now favorite chain restaurant ever, Bob Evans (home cookin’ and dirt cheap. Love it!).

Now. The scene.

It’s dark. It’s quiet (as the house has no TV – just the radio is playing). Mom and Mary are at the kitchen table, playing cards, I believe, and Dad is asleep in the front room, on the floor, snoring like only he can.

Welcome home, honey.

Introductions were had, hugs were shared and dad was awakened. We all visited for a bit, then retired to our respective rooms and respective air mattresses.

During the five days that Todd was with us, we ate and shopped, and Todd got to impress the folks by putting up towel racks and medicine cabinets. Go, Todd, go. He and the parents got along fabulously, sharing raunchy songs and calling each other names. Yes, he fit in just fine.

We had hoped the truck with the furniture would arrive while he was still there, but it was delayed in Nashville, so the day it arrived was the day Todd had to leave.
And here’s the weather stories to end all weather stories, even bigger than Snowpocalypse 08.

Thursday’s Drive To The Airport.

We had some snow on the ground but nothing compared to what it had done overnight. Our plan was to leave at 7:00am (for Todd’s 12:40pm flight) but Mom came in at 6am and said we needed to get on the road right freakin’ now.

Oh, mom. How bad can it be? Don’t you remember Snowmaggedon 08? Please…

Holy shit.

It was dark. It was pouring snow. Did you know that the roads twist and turn up there! And there are bridges. Lots and lots of bridges. My shoulders ached from tensing up. My hands hurt from gripping the steering wheel so hard. I did 40 mph in a 65 mph zone for an hour because I had no idea where the lane was. I told Todd a few times that if it was no better when we hit 79 (the major north/south freeway) we were turning around and he would just have to reschedule his flight. Dammit.

Luckily, once the sun came up, life improved considerably. I could see more than a foot in front of me and the snow let up a bit. It still made for a rough drive to Pittsburgh, but at least we weren’t in danger of sliding off the side of a mountain.

[Todd was gone, but his size 13 muddin' boots were still put to good use]

So, got Todd to the airport, turned right back around came home. And found the most interesting sight. A bulldozer, pulling a U-Haul truck up the hill to my folks’ place. The mud and ice were so bad, the U-Haul couldn’t make it up the hill. And if you remember correctly, the furniture was loaded into a semi-truck in Houston. Well, there was no way a semi was going to be able to get around the turns of the driveway, let alone, up the hill. So for a very large additional fee, the movers unloaded the furniture onto a U-Haul and brought that to the house. Believe it or not, it only took two trips.

There was quite the assembly line; truck to porch, porch to dining room, just inside the sliding door, dining room to correct room of the house. We were all so worried about the mud that would get tracked in, but there wasn’t a speck on the carpet. The inside team had their shoes off and the outside team dropped off items onto the moving pads that were sprawled out in the dining room. A very organized system.

And very tired men.

After the furniture was delivered, it was time to unpack and assemble. I spent Friday putting mom’s computer together and unpacking her desk. And here is a yet another example of where I get my organizational skills.


We also spent a good chunk of time on the kitchen. And Saturday was spent on getting the living room and front room/dad’s game room arranged. I spent all morning moving the end tables and pieces of the couch. Thanks goodness for a sectional that comes in sections. Much easier.

And Sunday, we were off to the airport so I could return to civilization and my family. The day started like any other travel day, then quickly turned into a drama flick with, as previously mentioned, me running through Newark airport, lungs on fire, backpack flopping around and me yelling “EXCUSE ME! EXCUSE ME!” while running on the moving sidewalk.

It’s truly amazing I didn’t fall on face.

I made it to the gate and ticket counter (while yelling “DID I MAKE IT?! DID I MAKE IT?!”) and a very nice gentleman unlocked the main door for me and ran with me down the jet way to another nice man who banged on the door of the airplane with me. My seat was in the third row from the back of the plane so everyone on board got to see me sweating, panting and wheezing as I worked my way as quickly as possible to my seat. Which was in the middle. Crap.

I don’t know if my lungs have fully bounced back yet.

I arrived in Seattle on time and my bag was the first one off the plane (probably because it was the last one loaded on the plane. And just how lucky am I that my bag actually made it on the plane? Wow). TBFE picked me up and off to the romantic and magical LaQuinta Inn and Suites in Tacoma we did head.

Yes, I’m serious.

I had a buyer’s seminar from 8 to 5 on Monday, and that’s really the only reason I came back from West Virginia when I did. And I knew that after flying alllllll day I would not be able to drag myself out of bed early enough to make it on time. So we had a nice little quiet welcome back evening in a hotel.
Also previously mentioned, the instructor of the seminar was dangerously close to making my head explode come 5pm so that made for a very long day, to say the least.

So yes, two weeks away from home, compounded with a stressful day of flying, compounded with a day long seminar, compounded with complete askewness (yes, it’s a word) in my home, well....Rae-rae had a teeny weenie little breakdown.

But all is good now!

I am back in the rhythm of things (I think), I’ve caught up on all of my blogs, I’ve gone through all of my mail, I’ve updated my Facebook status, I’ve returned my emails…..Yes, I think I’m all caught up.

Whew.

And now, some random photos for you....

[How you hold your roof up]

[Kitty lovin']

[The dedicated smoker]

[Christmas carnage]

[Tired Daddy and Goober]

So Purrfect....

You know I'm neurotic. Oh, but you have no idea HOW neurotic.

So neurotic that after being away from home for two weeks, then running through Newark airport because my first flight was delayed and my next plane was scheduled to leave RIGHT NOW and having to literally bang on the door to an airplane so they would let me in, then sitting for six hours, then staying in a motel in Tacoma, then sitting in a buyer's seminar taught by a woman from Austin who twanged for eight hours at a volume that made my head hurt, then coming home and not being able to find my VERY FAVORITE PILLOWCASE, I collapsed in the chair in the bedroom and cried for a good 30 minutes.

Maybe I should think about some more therapy?

I'm still working on the vacation post.
Haven't forgotten about you.
I have pictures!

Soon. I promise......

I'm Home

But I am tired.
I am fried.
I have no vacation post composed yet.
It's going to be a long one.
Bullets, maybe?

Will post again soon.

Need sleep now.