Well, I Declare!

I am making a declaration! I mean it!

And if I put it on the blog, well then, I have to adhere to it. You people hold me accountable, whether you know it or not.

{ahem}

As of April 15th, I will go 30 days without purchasing anything that is not essential for my survival. This includes:

• Nightstands or anything else for the boudoir
• Clothing
• Shoes
• Hanky Pankies
• Wine (unless it's part of the grocery shopping trip - cut me some slack)
• Manicures
• Bubble bath
• Movies (even $3 Crest movies)

In addition to not shopping, I will limit myself to one (1) meal out per week, with adult beverages. ONE. This "meal" includes breakfasts and lunches.

Of course, there are a few exemptions (aren't there always?)

• Morning coffee. It's $7 a week. I pay more than that for underwear now.
• Massages are, in fact, "essential for my survival", so I will keep my future appointments.
• Anything purchased with gift certificates. Cause I can't pay bills with gift certificates.
• Mother's Day cards.

I am motivated to get those credit card bills down! MOTIVATED! Why? I don't know. Let's not question it. Let's just declare, and then hope for the best. And 30 days seemed like a good trial period. If it goes well, and I don't die, well maybe I'll do it for another 30 days. And if I do it for a few 30 days in row, maybe I'll get my credit cards paid off before I'm 60.

The key to success will be enlisting Jamie's help.

As a matter of fact, Jamie, my enabler, has initiated a shopping trip tomorrow evening. She does not know about this genius plan yet. I committed to shopping before I came up with it. This is why the plan starts on the 15th. Well, that and my Birthday Brunch-n-Spa day is Saturday.

So, between now and Tuesday (did I mention I took Friday off? I have some shopping to do......) I will live life to the fullest in Target and Nordstrom. But come Tuesday! I am On The Wagon.

I spend a lot of time On The Wagon, don't I?
Sad.

Anyway, I will be On The Wagon! I will pay off my credit cards! I will put money in savings! I will start off year 34............wait.

My Christ year is 33. April 14th means I have completed my 33rd year of life. I've ALREADY HAD my Christ year. Your Christ year is your pivotal year!

Well. Last year WAS the big pivotal year, wasn't it? Huh. Or does your Christ year start on your 33rd birthday, going into your 34th year? Anyone?

(Exceptionally funny thing here - I googled "your christ year" to find clarification and the first site to pop up was my blog. It's a weird full circle kind of thing.)

Where was I?

Oh, right.

Here I go! Responsible adult! It's only 30 days. I can do this!

Wish me luck.
Send gift cards.

Kitchen Makeover!

Wala! A little colorful wrapping paper and my kitchen shelf is TRANSFORMED!

Okay, maybe not transformed, but prettyfied. Right? I may do the little panels on the pantry door, too, but Jessica's had enough Martha Stewart fun for tonight.

Breaking News!

Ben & Jerry's Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough ice cream has replaced Ben & Jerry's Half Baked frozen yogurt as my favorite ice creamy treat. It's all downhill from here.

Also, Sunday evening is the absolute worse time to go grocery shopping. They're out of everything.

Yes, I left the house. Shock and amazement.

I hit Paper Zone, Marshall's, Sears, Target, and Ballard Market. I came home with gift boxes, tissue paper, shampoo, wine, ice cream, broccoli and the book "Dreams from My Father" by Obama, which I plan to start in about 15 minutes when I'm in a scalding hot bath with my glass of wine. It's a nice way to top off a lazy day.

Sunday Blahs

I'm blue today. Not sure why. So, of course, I'm overanalyzing it and trying to figure out just where the "blue" is and why.

Which makes me even more blue.

I could be tired. I blame the drive to Covington last night for the monthly gals' dinner. After dinner, we all went back to Nichole's and had birthday cake. She bought me an ice cream cake. My first ever. Then she barked at me to "blow out the goddamn candles, Raechelle, they're melting on the cake!" I love Nichole. She reminds me a lot of my mom. Nichole may not be so flattered to hear that.

Anyway, since we were all just lounging around, I didn't leave her place until 11pm or so. I got home and went straight to bed, and slept pretty well until 7am when my new upstairs neighbor, Esther (who I fear may be a morning person), started clomping around. She must have left around 7:30am, because it got quiet again, so I slept until 9:30am.

Then, since I was blinded by sunlight, I figured I'd make the most of the nice day and go for a walk. Couldn't hurt to burn off the mud pie ice cream cake from last night. It was a good walk. I wanted a new route, so I maybe slightly inadvertently but maybe on purpose walked by The Ex's place. And I maybe felt like a stalker. Nothing noteworth except all of the blinds are down and his car has a new hole in the side.

Funny thing. I've dreamed about him for the past two nights (source of the blue?). In one dream, I was visiting him and was just appalled at the state of the apartment. Then he morphed into a creepy doctor I work with. In the other dream, I was visiting him again and he was making dinner. We were hugging and I remember thinking, "Why bother? It's not like this relationship is ever going to go anywhere." He asked me to put his cell phone away because he didn't want to be bothered and as I was putting it in the drawer of the coffee table, I noticed the screensaver was a picture of me. Then I was sitting on the couch and his girlfriend came over with her parents. And she was none too happy that I was there. And that's it. So he was on my mind as I set out this morning.

Got home from my walk, stretched, ate some breakfast, took a shower, then just sat in my new chair and stared out the window while I drank my tea. And I have no plans for day. None. How weird is that? My Sheauns are both traveling, Jamie has to study, Val's out of town, Rachelle has Date Morning with her man on Sundays......

I'm all alone.
I don't think I'm handling it well.
Could very well be PMS.

I'm not used to this downtime. I know it's good for me, but then I beat myself up because there are things I should be doing. That's what I want on my headstone - "But there are things I should be doing!!"

I should call my ex-sis-in-sin. I've been wanting to see her for a month and just haven't had the time to get up there and visit. I should call my ex-aunt-in-sin to see how she's recuperating after a recent medical procedure she had done. I should go see Milo and Kim. I should go grocery shopping. I should take my vacuum in for servicing since I've never had it serviced in the five years I've had it AND I have a 50% off coupon. I should get my hair trimmed. I should take the pile of stuff in my corner to Goodwill. I should sneak into Shaun's apartment and do laundry (and clean for him - because I'm good like that.) I should do SOMETHING! I feel like I'm wasting the day.

But I can't seem to move from this chair. My mind is on overload with everything it wants to do, but my body is not cooperating. Maybe it's already exhausted from what's coming up: Monday: Jessica. Tuesday: walking, Wednesday: massage, maybe shopping with Jamie, Thursday: maybe shopping with Jamie if Wednesday doesn't work, Friday: happy hour with Jamie and her school buds. I may take Friday off. I have Monday, the 14th, off (because, ahem, it's my birthday) so why not just take Friday off too and make it a four day weekend?

Honestly, I just want to go back to bed.

Ooh, my Carrie Bradshaw moment:

At what point do we listen to our bodies and just do what it wants, without thinking there's something wrong?

Hair Update

I have discovered the timer feature on my camera. Lucky for you.

Because my arms are not long enough to do the self portrait and get all of the hair. Yes, it's that long. Actually, it could use a trim. It's been since October.

I'm not as stoned as I look. I just don't know what I'm supposed to do when I'm waiting for a camera to take my photo, ya know?

If I can refrain from whacking it all off (it's becoming a major pain in the ass) I will be a mermaid for Halloween. An "authentic" mermaid. Well, maybe with pasties. Because pasties are very fashionable these days. No sir, not just for strippers anymore!

Somewhat of an Update

There's nothing too interesting to share right now. But it's been a busy week, nonetheless.

Monday, Jessica stayed over, which meant dinner out. Never a bad thing.
Tuesday, walking Greenlake with Rachelle and then dinner with Shaun.
Wednesday, There Will Be Blood* with McP and his roommate.
Thursday, Jamie's birthday! So, dinner and drinks.
Today, death.

Because I got a wild hair and had pork shoulder (who knew?) at dinner last night and oh gawd, my stomach is not at all happy about this. My muscles are actually sore from trying to move this shit along (no pun intended). Lesson learned. I don't do red meat. Unless it's bacon. But is bacon really red meat? It's mostly fat, right? So, apparently, my body is fine with eating straight fat, but it has a slight problem with actual meat.

Well, okay fine.

Tonight was supposed to be a work happy hour, but I just want to go home and fall asleep on the couch. Much like last night.

*Now, about this movie. I am not a Daniel Day Lewis fan. And I take a lot of crap for this. The Sheauns try to tell me he's most likely the best actor of our time, I MUST see In The Name Of The Father, blah blah blah. Don't care. Still don't like him. He's just a little too intense for me. But I went to this movie because 1) it was only $3, 2) McP is going out of town for a while and I wanted to see him before he left and 3) I thought I should see at least one Oscar nominated movie.

And it was just okay. I didn't get the hugeness of it all. I kept waiting for the big crux and I don't feel like it ever came. Even McP thought it didn't live up to the hype.

But oh, the best part of the movie? When DDL gets slapped around by a preacher kid. I thoroughly enjoyed that.

Now That's More Like It!

ARIES (March 21-April 19): Work could take a back seat to your personal enjoyment today. A romantic interlude could highlight the day, whether with a current love interest or perhaps somebody new. Be alert and look for the signs.

And as if to reinforce this, a co-worker just sent me an email:

"Interested in a blind date? He's 6'1", likes sports, motorcycles, cars, fine food, and travel. Here are some pics in case you can't see his page. Lemme know!"

Wheee!

And from the Houston Chronicle:

ARIES (March 21-April 19). Why save your dollars for a rainy day? It's so much more fun to spend money on a sunny one! Anyhow, rain or shine, you're due for a splurge. You reinforce your belief in abundance by spending bigger.

Ironically enough, I just got a lovely little birthday gift card in the mail! And it's actually sunny today!

The universe is lovin' Raechelle!

And I need more coffee!

Gimme A Break, Will Ya?

My horoscope from the Seattle Times today:

ARIES (March 21-April 19): The future is not what it used to be. You may be faced with a drastic change or a new group of people. As alarming as it may sound this could have a dramatic yet positive influence on your future.

Um. How is this new news?
I believe that "drastic change" and that "new group of people" took place last summer.

Unless....

Oh no....

Does this mean yet ANOTHER drastic change is on it's way?

Oh, for the love of puppies! What could possibly happen now?! I just got a new gang! I've been so good! My social life is on fire! I haven't cried in, like, MONTHS!

I like the whole "positive influence" part, but come on! I cannot take another DRASTIC CHANGE.

It sounds bad. Doesn't it sound bad? It could be good, but I'm not in the most positive frame of mind today, so it just sounds bad. Ominous. More drama. I don't want anymore drama. I've been drama free for months now. I just want normal. Ho-hum. No drastic changes. No new group of people.

Another drastic change will break me.
I mean it.

No more changes. Please?
No more.....

Who Is The Biggest Bitch Of Them All?

The word "bitch" has been used to describe me on more than one occasion. This doesn't really upset me anymore.

There's a fine line between being a bitch and being forthright, or frank. I used to have that oh-I-have-to-be-liked-by-everyone-or-I-will-just-die! mentality, so I would tiptoe around topics and falter when asking someone to do something. But as I get older (and still look like I'm 20) I've learned that I have to be painfully direct sometimes. And in my position, I have to work with difficult people to get things done. I have some authority and my bosses keep telling me to use it.

But being frank and direct also comes in handy when people are just flat out pissing me off.

I ordered a big ass bulletin board for someone, but they failed to actually measure the wall first, so the bulletin board is too big. She fully admitted that her natural hair color is blond. So, the bulletin board has to go back. But there's nowhere to put it until then, so it's in the hallway, outside of my office.

And all morning, people would walk by, see this bulletin board, then stick their head in my office and say, "You know ya got a big bulletin board out here?" or "Hey, what's this big bulletin board for?"

This is the kind of shit that will make me snap.

So I put a sign on the bulletin board - that pink piece of paper:



"Please do not tell me there is a bulletin board out here. I am well aware. Thanks, Raechelle."

Now, the smart people around here understand what this sign means. They know that I am sick and tired of people commenting about this thing, and they walk by my office and smile, but they do not say anything. They love me. And they know. They just know.

But the newbies.....ah, they think it's funny. So, to fit in and pal around, they poke their head in and say, "Hey! (hee hee) Ya know ya got a board out here? (hee hee)"

They think they're being social and cute. They don't know about Raechelle's temper and her short fuse. And, unfortunately, as in every learning situation, an example must be set.

Newbie [poking his head in]: Hey! (hee hee) I don't know if you know this.....

Me [in my very serious voice]: I swear to gawd if you mention that bulletin board I will throw this stapler at you, do you hear me?

Newbie [blink blink]: Oh....uh.....sorry....

This newbie probably doesn't like me now. I'm okay with that.
And it's been three hours since anyone has mentioned the bulletin board to me.

A Small Example Of Why My Mother Is My Best Friend

My morning email to mom:

From: Raechelle
Sent: Monday, March 31, 2008 11:36 AM
To: Mama
Subject: mornin'

How are you?
I am bored.
I am tired.
Want to be independently wealthy.

love ya
b

Mom's reply:

From: Mama
To: Raechelle
Subject: RE: mornin'
Date: Today 10:14am

I am fine.
I can't help you.
I still can't help you.
And I still can't help you (unless you marry one of those rich doctors!)

I love you too.
Mom

Quiet Weekend

Not a whole lot to report from Raechelle-land.

I just cancelled my Match membership. I had made a tentative date for this evening with one of the three guys I met, but he ended up falling to the bottom of the priority list and, honestly, I'd rather just go to bed than meet up with him. That, my friends, is a clear sign.

I did make a plan to meet up with Match guy #2 this week. We'll refer to him as SanFran Man, since he just moved up here from San Francisco in November. He's low energy. At our date two weeks ago, we just babbled about random stuff the whole night. It was easy and there was never really that awkward silence. So, meeting up and having a drink doesn't really stress me out. The other guy? Stresses me out.

And then there was a third date that I may have just failed to mention altogether. Totally not worth the energy it would take to tell you how icky it was.

**********

I just went upstairs and introduced myself to Esther, my new neighbor. Nice girl. Eyebrows so shapely and pointy you think they're going to fly off her face and stab you. And she plays guitar and sings. Heard her last night. So we talked about singing and playing.

I did not ask about her laundry day. I think I'm just going to drop my off at the wash and fold place tomorrow.

**********

Yesterday afternoon, I went to Burien (shoot me) to see Nichole's final wedding dress selection. She did good. The dress is beautiful. And believe it or not, I found yet another wedding dress that I would not be opposed to wearing, should that mythical wedding day ever happen in my lifetime.

*sigh*

No, no one has applied to be my Sugar Daddy or my Baby's Daddy. Maybe someone could check the "Email Me!" link. Just to be sure it's working?

**********

I took little Milo for a walk today. And I very cleverly roped Jamie into going with us. Only after she agreed that a walk would be a good idea, did I ask her "Do you mind if we take a 9 month old cutie pie with us?" Bad, aren't I?

I don't think she minded too much as she oohed and ahhed over him and even took pictures with her phone. Yes, I think she had an okay time.

**********

Then I met up with an old friend, K-Ski (I'm getting good at the monikers, huh?). I think we'd last seen each other in August, so she asked to get all caught up. I told her about the fiasco and the shit that hit the fan and at the end she just said, "Wow, Raechelle. And look at you now! You're doing great! Good for you!"

That's exactly what I needed to hear.

**********

And here we are.

I haven't slept much the last two nights, so I'm looking forward to taking a soakie and then just crashing. I have every evening this week booked. Jessica stays tomorrow, walking (hopefully) on Tuesday, San Fran Man maybe Wednesday, maybe a movie on Thursday.

**********

And a special end note:

Shaun bought me a chocolate bunny for easter.
Everyone now: Ahhhhhhh

Except he forgot to give it to me when I was over there last Sunday evening.
Everyone now: For shame!

It's not hollow, but it's chocolate and it's a bunny and that's all that matters.

Happy Friday!

And because I have nothing interesting to share with you today, please enjoy this song by Flight of the Conchords.

Monokini

I can't tell you how happy I am that the monokini is back in style.

Or has it been back in style for a while, but I'm just noticing?

Anywho, I had a couple of these when I was...ahem....younger and they are very flattering for those of us who have big ol' child bearing hips and a rather large boobular area. And, unfortunately, I will need to buy a new swimsuit this summer.

My two piece looks ridiculous on me now.

I Am A Moron, Reason 168

I try to multitask at the absolute wrong time.

Like when I'm closing a drawer and I suddenly remember something I need to get out of the drawer so I think I can reach in and get it AND close the drawer AT THE SAME TIME. Then I wonder why my fingers hurts.

Or I try to lock the door to save myself time but forget that I haven't even opened the door yet, so I try to yank open the door, but the door is already locked so my hand slips off and hits 1) me, 2) the door or 3) the doorjam.

Or I want to grab something really quickly out of the cabinet so I open the cabinet, but my brain doesn't give my hand enough time to actually reach in the cabinet, grasp what I need, then remove my hand, so I end up slamming the door of the cabinet on my hand.

Yes, there is a reason this topic has suddenly popped into my head. And I am typing without the use of two of fingers.

What Can I Tell You?

Let's see...

I tried to shop on Sunday. Everything was closed. Big stuff, like Target, was closed. Who knew? I braved blinding rain to go all the way down to Ikea for my nightstands and, while Ikea was actually open (and full of children in their easter church going attire) they were out of the nightstands. Wonderful. Every other store I tried to hit was closed, so I came home. Only to find that Aurora was also closed so I sat in traffic (still in the blinding rain), talking to mom on my headset (and accidently using the F a lot because I was extremely upset) for a very long time.

Once I got home, I immediately got into my jammies (or as Jessica calls them - pjammies. Which I absolutely love.) and curled up on the couch for the rest of the day. And then the sun came out. Freakin' fantastic.

**********

I lost my nosering. I was cleaning it and it fell down the sink drain THROUGH THE HAIRTRAP. Tenacious little thing. Since I was going up to Capital Hill Sunday evening to watch a movie with the Sheauns, I just walked to Laughing Buddha and got another one. However, it was apparently too small because the post kept falling and poking out of my nostril. Which will never do. So I called the apartment maintenance people yesterday and asked if they could please remove the elbow from the sink drain and see if the stud was still in there. And it was. I found it on my sink when I got home yesterday. Whew. Crisis averted.

And I think I'll drop off some brownies for the maintenance guy because I felt really weird asking him to fish my nosering out of a drain.

**********

Jessica stayed last night. We went to Blue C for dinner and to trivia at a pub afterwards. When we got home, she let me subject her to home movies for merely the cost of a bottle of wine. As long as her glass was full, she was enthralled in the videos. And that is why I love her.

**********

I have not seen Jamie since Thursday and I'm starting to have withdrawals. So we're having dinner tonight.

**********

My birthday is coming up.
Wha...? Who said that?

**********

I'm either depressed or getting a cold. I have no appetite today. And that is a clear sign that something is wrong. Maybe I just need a hug. It's amazing what just a hug can do for your well being. Everyone should get a hug at least once a day. From someone. Except from a crazy person on the street because that may not be so good for your well being.

But it might help them.

**********

I did not get a hollow chocolate easter bunny this year. Now, I'm not blaming anyone, I'm just letting you know. It's probably best. I don't need the calories. I tried on all of my shorts recently, and believe it or not, they're all too big. I see more shopping in my future. Especially since....

**********

I bought my first plane ticket of the summer! Going to Nestorville for a week in July. I'm going to run around barefoot (well, walk around. I don't run unless there is something very large and scary chasing me), play in the creek and discuss all of the pros and cons of cow manure. It is truly a magical time.

**********

Hmm. And I think you're all caught up now.

Happy Easter

We were sure I was destined to be a Playboy Bunny.
I think it was the afro that that doomed me.....

A Sneak Peek Into The Secret Lives Of Women

The curtains got put up Thursday night!

Jessica was staying over, and Jamie had a horrible day, so I made dinner and we cracked open a bottle of wine.

Then we broke out the drill.

Jamie drilled.


Jessica drilled.


Watching them was exhausting!

Oh, I did my part. There was so much dust!


And you men thought it was all pillow fights in lingerie......

Just need the nightstands and something for above the bed. Then you get pictures!

Paranoia Is Nothing New To Me

This is the kind of freak accident that could possibly make me hole up in my bathroom for the rest of my life.

But that has it's own dangers now, doesn't it?

Wash-n-Fold ROCKS

I could quite possibly become addicted to dropping my laundry off.

My whites were all in their own little bag. My darks were all in their own little bag. Everything was folded oh so carefully. Everything smells fantastic and my Friday evening is magically free!

I may have to budget in this lovely service.

The Laundry Stress Is Back

My upstairs neighbor, Sally, moved out. If you remember, Sally and I switched laundry days so I got rid of the whole Friday laundry day and moved to Wednesday, which I thought would work perfectly since Lost was on Wednesdays. But now it's on Thursdays. Funny, huh?

Well, now I'm back to Fridays. And I haven't laundry in over two weeks. All of my jeans are dirty, my fancy new undies are dirty and I'm almost out of towels. So, I dropped it off at the wash-n-fold place in Fremont this morning on my way to work. Know how much laundry a gal accumulates in two weeks, not counting her primary work clothes because those are dry cleaned (or Dryeled, because I don't do dry cleaners)?

Twenty pounds. 2-0.
And we're looking at $1.10 a pound, which I originally thought would be NOTHIN' because how much can laundry really weigh?

Twenty pounds. That's how much.

I figured if I'm getting my laundry done, might as well grab anything and everything in the apartment that needs washed, so I'm sure most of that is towels, some of which were wet.

Yes, quite the lesson learned. Now, if I just take it once a week, it would probably be about five pounds and I would remember not to take the wet towels. I may just put up a sign above the mailboxes in my building:

"Would anyone be interested in switching laundry days with me? My laundry day is currently Friday, but I'm a single gal and that's a primo date night, so it doesn't really fit my schedule. Maybe I could just share a day? I work during the day and would only be able to laundry in the evenings. Thanks."

The wash-n-fold place could get really expensive.....