Because my arms are not long enough to do the self portrait and get all of the hair. Yes, it's that long. Actually, it could use a trim. It's been since October.
I'm not as stoned as I look. I just don't know what I'm supposed to do when I'm waiting for a camera to take my photo, ya know?
If I can refrain from whacking it all off (it's becoming a major pain in the ass) I will be a mermaid for Halloween. An "authentic" mermaid. Well, maybe with pasties. Because pasties are very fashionable these days. No sir, not just for strippers anymore!