She’s Wound Up Tighter Than a Pissed Off Rattlesnake

My horoscope for today.

From The Seattle Times:

Aries (March 21-April 19): Today is a 5 -- A puzzle you've been putting together finally starts to make sense. A little more work and you'll solve the mystery.

Really? It’s all going to make sense now?
Thank.Gawd.

Cause this funky little dance of sell for this price, buy for this price, put this much down, but you need this much for closing costs, but have this much money left over is going to give me a freakin’ heart attack.

Todd asked me this morning if I would be disappointed if we took the house off the market and just stopped this. He said maybe it’s just too much with all of the other stresses. And I asked him, “Are you stressed about the wedding? Really?”

And he sighed and said, "No."
I said, “Neither am I.”

It's just this house stuff. But it should be done soon. It has to be done by September 7. We’ve decided that if we have no acceptable offers, if we can’t find another place we like, we stop this madness cold turkey so we can really enjoy the last two months leading up to the wedding.

So we’ve got one week.

There are things happening. Trust me. But the funky little dance isn’t written down on paper yet. That’s the key. The signatures.

One week. Just a little bit longer….

…but man, my head hurts.

Braindead

I missed another game! Dammit!

I complete forgot (I KNOW!) that the Seahawks played last night. FOR.GOT.

We got caught up in a movie (Leatherheads – awesome) and then in the midst, had to vacate for a showing, then came back and finished the movie, then ordered pizza and watched another movie (Lords of Dogtown – also awesome), then watched the documentary about that movies, and then went to bed.

And I missed my boys win yet another pre-season game!

I’m sorry, guys. I promise to pay better attention and look at the calendar regularly (the games are on the calendar!) Really.

They play again Thursday. I've got a big post it note on my monitor.

I will not miss this.

Why Didn't I Think of That?

It's fabulous.

A box for your RSVPs. No on one side, Yes on the other side. Alphabetized index cards to separate by name. And even matches the invitations!

Genius.


My friend, CB, says "Ridiculous. I will get a shoebox and MAKE you one of those. Much better."

But will it be covered in pretty paper?

She says, "Of course!"

I say, she's hired.

Why can't I think of this stuff before other people do? Oddly enough, this site is by the same woman who wrote my Big Ass Wedding Book. She's a pro. She knows what the crazy brides want. We want useless boxes of crap that are pretty and remind us that we're getting married!

Speaking of crazy and organizing, I got on a kick last night and organized the hell out of our white board. I've got a list of things we still need to spend money on, a list of To Do items, a list of questions for the caterer, and taped to the board, a drawing that eerily resembles a football playbook that tells me who is riding in which car to get from West Seattle to the rehearsal dinner and then who is riding in which car to get back to West Seattle/the hotel downtown/back their lodging.

There are lots of arrows.

All the while, Todd worked on the processional music and drafted up some programs. We were bustling. Today, we're emailing ideas about paper back and forth. There will be a trip to Paper Zone this evening.

Yes, it's a good day.

Random Thoughts About The Weekend Update

We had another open house, and I, of course, had another freak out. There will be no more open houses. I cannot take it. We had some genuine interest this time, so hopefully, there will be no need for another open house.

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We also have a showing scheduled for tomorrow, and I just got a call from someone at my company who saw my listing on our company news board. We have movement!

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TBFE and I went Kauai shopping. And I bought (er…Todd bought me) a bathing suit! And I actually feel kinda good in it! I am ready for the beach…

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We met with my friend who is making our wedding cake. And I told Todd last night, there is a certain beauty to planning this wedding among house buying and house selling and teenager drama.

We don’t fret over the details.

Our cake meeting took a whopping 30 minutes. We said we like this, we don’t like this, we want to do this, there are this many people, and BAM. We’re getting a wedding cake. We don’t have the energy to scrutinize the details, like how many roses we want on the cake or how many different types of combinations or do we want fondant or buttercream frosting.

Just gimme a damn cake that tastes good and let’s move on. I got things to do.

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I forgot my glasses at home and my head already hurts from staring at the computer. Maybe it’s time for eye appointment and back up glasses?

Nah. I’m not ready yet.

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The Seahawks won Saturday night!! We’re 2-0!

Okay, yes it’s only preseason, but hopefully it’s a good sign for regular season.

And the Redskins beat the Steelers. Holy crap. Way to go, ‘Skins!

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We bought new shampoo and toothpaste this weekend. The shampoo smell is different and the toothpaste taste is different. So I have this “homesick” feeling in my gut. I get this when I’m surrounded by unfamiliarity.

I have a new shirt on, too. That’s not helping.

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Which is a more significant sign of aging –

The fact that I get those little, stiff, black hairs on my chin, or the fact that I can oh-so-discreetly yank them out with my tweezers while sitting in my cube because I have been doing it for years and I am THAT GOOD?

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Every now and then, I am distracted by my sparklerific ring. Either the light catches it just so or it knocks against something and makes a loud thunk. And then it hits me all over again.

I’m getting married.

And then I think, “I just wanted to sing with a band. Really.”

Funny how things work out.

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To wrap up this riveting post, please enjoy this pic a snuggling Tom.

Tom doesn’t care if you’re laying on your stomach, your back or your side. If he sees a warm body, he’s on it. He laid like that until my arm fell asleep and I had to rollover.

My little, fuzzy baby...

I Am Offended!

From The Seattle Times:

Aries (March 21-April 19): Today is a 7 -- You're doing something the hard way concerning record-keeping. It's too hard to find what you need. Get organized.

Excuse me? "Get organized"?

Just who do you think you're talking to, Ms. Universe?

Have you seen my Holy-Crap-I'm-Actually-Getting-Married spreadsheet (15 tabs!) and organizer?

I enter my receipts into Quicken at least once a week. And I have all of my blank birthday cards in their month appropriate pocket in coordination with the person I think they're good for. And our Google calendar color coordinated so that we can glance at it to see who is doing what that day (I am red, Todd is blue, Kayleigh is green and Tyler is tan). And my shoes (that aren't in storage) are still in their labeled, clear bins.

I am organized!!

Oh wait.

Are you talking about the wedding invitation I lost? Is that what you mean?

Well, I had to clean up my desk for the open houses and I put a bunch stuff "somewhere" so it would be out of the way, but still accessible, but now I can't find that pile of stuff and I finally had to email Jessica and ask where her wedding was again because I have "temporarily misplaced" the invite and this pains me more than you could ever, ever know.

She replied with, "Rae-rae! I am SHOCKED."

Sigh.

Rae-rae loses things now. It's very sad.
But, by gawd, I am still "organized"!

Sleep

Yeah, I’m gettin’ none of that. I thought I would crash hard last night, but even with a nip of my codeine cough syrup, I was still either awake most of the night or snoozing but could hear every little thing around me. Even with earplugs.

This is odd to me because I have never had a problem sleeping. My mother often tells people that, when I was just a baby, she finally took me to the doctor because I was sleeping 12 hours a day. She would put me down at 7pm, then have to physically wake me at 9am the next morning. The doctor’s response?

Don’t knock it. Consider yourself lucky.

I’m still like that, although 12 hours really isn’t an option anymore. Now, sleeping in means getting at 9:00am. Which really is plenty of sleep. I should be thankful for that.

I’m not sure what I’ll do tonight. Benadryl? Valarian? Baseball bat? There are lots of options. I just hope I’m not up again. Three nights of very little sleep is gonna make Rae-rae a cranky biach.

You Said It, Girlfriend

Thank you, TBFE. For the laugh.

And the nightmares that are sure to come tonight....

Weekend Update

It was a good weekend. Lots of social time, lots of house time and very low stress. I like weekends like that.

Friday night Todd and I hung out the Celtic Swell and decompressed and talked wedding stuff. We even had the waitresses helping. So how can that not be fun?

Saturday, we continued the wedding fun and visited the Sanctuary at Admiral again to get some measurements, look at the tables and arrangements and time the walk down the aisle. We figured out where the chairs would be, where the cake will be, where the jugglers will be.

Just kidding. There will be no jugglers. Sorry.

That afternoon, Todd finished up the new railing on the porch and I detailed the inside of Sportacus, his truck. He’s cleaner than Ruby now. I’m not happy with that. So guess what I’ll be doing this coming weekend?

That night, we traveled to Ballard to see Thornton Creek play at Egan’s. Egan’s is a great little venue with wonderful food and a homey, friendly vibe. We sat with a few of the Millers and visited throughout the show. I’m very lucky that Todd likes them as much as I do. And they seem to like him, too. I also saw some acquaintances I hadn’t seen in years, so I got to tell the whole I’m-getting-married! story again and introduce my fiancé. Who knew there was anyone left that I hadn’t gushed to?!

Sunday, the wedding fun continued as Kim and I went and bought her Best Lady dress. Then we just wandered around and oohed and ahhhed over all the frilliness. I told Kim, whenever I’m in bad mood, I’m just going to go to a bridal shop and hang out. You can’t help but smile when you see the little flower girls running around in their pretty dresses, or the young brides in the big, poofy gowns.

I told Todd a few days ago, I’m almost sad that the wedding is so near. I already miss the conversations about what color theme we should have and do we want a buffet or a family style dinner (family style. Definitely.) All of the decisions we had to make in the beginning and buying my first wedding magazines and ripping out pages of dresses that I liked.

Sigh.

He said I’ll get to experience it again when Kayleigh gets married. I keep asking her if she has a boyfriend yet, but she just rolls her eyes at me.

The rest of Sunday was spent doing some house cleaning, making some dinner and then watching the repeat of the first preseason Seahawks game that originally aired on Saturday but I missed it because I have completely lost my mind and can’t even keep track of when football starts. I hate myself. And now the Seahawks are going to suck this year because I wasn’t there at their very first kick off, in my Seahawks sweatshirt, with my Seahawks coasters, screaming for them to KICK SOME ASS.

Please forgive me, ‘Hawks. I just have a lot going on right now. What the hell was I thinking, planning a wedding during football season?! I promise to not miss any more games. Well, except September 27th’s because that’s my bridal shower and I don’t think football factors into my mother-in-law’s vision of wine and cupcakes and then on November 15th I’ll be drunk out of my gourd on a beach in Kauai, so unless I can find a battery powered TV, no can watch. I hope you guys understand.

Maybe the Seahawks don’t need me, because they beat the Chargers, 21 to 14. We sacked the Chargers’ QB 4 times and made 2 (or 3?) interceptions. That’s a pretty good start to the season.

And all of the games are now on the Google calendar. So, I have no excuse.

Sunday night, Todd and I tried to go bed early, but I got a wild hair to make a present for a friend and then we both laid down, but neither one of us really slept all night. Well, until 5:30 this morning.

Why is that? You lay awake all night, unable to sleep, tossing and turning. Then your alarm goes off, you hit snooze and BAM, you’re out like a light, dreaming and everything, and then you wake with a jolt and you’re late for work. When you should have just gotten up at 4am and gone on in early, rather than continuing to try to sleep, only to actually fall asleep right when you’re supposed to be getting out of bed.

Yes, you could say I’m a bit cranky today.

But my day is almost over, and it hasn’t been too terribly bad. So here’s hoping for a good 10 hours of sleep tonight. Gotta catch up.

Go ‘Hawks.

General Life Update

To answer the question that is on everyone’s mind – there are no new updates on the houses, the old or the new. We’re assuming the bank is still taking it’s sweet time approving our offer on the new one, and the old one hasn’t had a showing yet. But we are not deterred! Since our closing on the new house isn’t set until September 30th, we really don’t want the house to sell right away. Because then where would we live? If we get to September 15th and we still haven’t had any showings or offers, then I might panic. But it’s too soon for that.

Look at me, being all level headed and practical.

Todd’s stepdad was down last week, helping put up the new porch railing, when he came into the kitchen and said, “You know, you seem to be doing pretty well with everything that’s going on.”

I replied, “It’s the alcohol.”
Bob said, “Oh…that’ll do it…”

My therapist tells me I appear to be holding it together pretty well, too. I’m flattered. I really don’t FEEL that stressed – like crying at the drop of a hat, or screaming my head off for no reason stressed. I think my stress lives solely in my brain.

It’s hard to tell what’s natural and comes with aging, or what is simply losing my mind. For instance, I lost a credit card. Never in my life, even as an irresponsible 20 something, have I ever lost something so important. And now, I’ve lost a credit card. I lost Jessica’s wedding invitation. I moved a box of tissues when we were taking photos for the listing and could not for the life of me find them after the shoot (an hour later, I found them behind my dresser. Wha..?)

I forgot to shampoo my hair one morning. Went straight to the conditioner. Then couldn’t figure out why my hair was so greasy later that day. And sometimes, I have to ask what day it is.

Funny. These are also symptoms of perimenopause. Wonder if the hot flashes and night sweats are signs of stress, too?

My therapist suggests I take a little time each day, just for me, just to let my brain have some quiet time. I’ve told you about my Tom therapy. That helps. Being able to decompress and download to Todd helps, too. Just to get everything off my mind at the end of the day.

And I feel like we’re in a lull right now. We can’t actively do anything to sell the house (except clean. And build a railing, but that’s finished now.) or buy the other house. So I’m in hyper wedding mode.

I have contacted my friend who is making the wedding cake and there will be a meeting next week about the details. The invitations are done, but those don’t need to be mailed until September. I’ll probably contact the caterer in September as well, to finalize the menu and all that fun stuff. Todd and I have been compiling music and sketching out the itinerary for the ceremony, so that makes us feel productive.

And Kim and I are going dress shopping on Sunday!

Speaking of Kim, I thought of her when I saw this LOL cat.


She’s already married, though, so it shouldn’t come to this.

(Late) Weekend Update

In bullets!
Because I’m lazy (loaded word).

Friday

* Attended the opening of Kayleigh’s play, The Music Man, at West Seattle High School. After first having dinner and margaritas.

* The play was great, Kayleigh was great. Here’s a pic from the West Seattle Blog.

* We forgot to get flowers, but took her out for ice cream afterwards.

* Home. Bed.

Saturday

* TBFE and the kids painted the new railing to the porch and cleaned off a patio set that magically appeared Friday morning. Real estate agents are sneaky that way.

* I made banana nut muffins for breakfast, did lots of overdue admin work and contacted a plumber to come out and see why there was water on the kids’ bathroom floor.

* Plumber came out, and it appears the toilet overflowed, yet no one noticed. Until late Thursday night. Plumber fixed the toilet. All is well (and dry).

* Todd and I went to Costco to prepare for Sunday’s shoot and then hit the grocery store.

* I made dinner (baked spaghetti) and we watched Serendipity while Kayleigh was at her play. Cute little movie.

* Then bed.

Sunday

* Todd was up and out at 8:00am to shoot the next Duo short.

* I slept in, then took two hours getting myself together. I plucked, shaved, exfoliated, blow dried and painted stuff. It’s a rare day when I get a chance to groom.

* I took Kayleigh to her matinee and then joined Todd at the shoot.

* We wrapped about 4:00pm, then headed across the street with Trish, Dan and Dan for some munchies and beverages at The Bohemian, our new favorite little bar.

* Picked Kayleigh up after her play, headed home and vegged for the remainder of the evening.

* Then bed.

Yes, it was another one of those weekends.....whew. The fun never stops!

My Horoscope

From The Seattle Times:

Aries (March 21-April 19): Work out your plan so that you know exactly what you're doing. You always find it comforting to have a blueprint.


Well, duh.
Tell me something I don't already know.

Random Thoughts

I started taking prenatal vitamins. I call them my baby pills. Which makes Todd laugh and cringe at the same time. No, I’m not trying to get pregnant. Although I have this secret fear that taking prenatal vitamins makes my body pregnant. Todd assures me that’s not how it works.

I just want my hair and nails to be healthy and pretty.

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I’m also using moisturizing body wash now, in order to make my skin silky smooth and hydrated. My Big Ass Wedding Book told me to. And I must listen to The Big Ass Wedding Book.

Although, I’m not a body wash kinda gal. I was raised on soap and a wash cloth. The loofa is weird and I can’t keep a hold of it. And it just doesn’t feel like it’s getting me clean, especially after this particularly hot and stinky week. But my skin is smoother, and Todd says I smell good, so I guess it’s okay.

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Speaking of the wedding, I had a dream last night that it was the wedding day but everything was off. Todd was watching me get into my gown and I was thinking, “He’s not supposed to see me yet!” And my hair was down, but pulled back a little (not at all what I had in mind) and I didn’t have earrings but I thought, “Oh well. Who will notice?” Ha! Not at all like me. Then I couldn’t find my Schedule Enforcer, Julie, and was thinking maybe she didn’t even show up, and the hair and make up gal wasn’t there, so I was trying to put on enough eyeliner to do that smoky thing.

But I also noticed my dress was a smidge looser. That made me happy.

Eventually, I realized everything was awry because we had moved the wedding up. By a couple of months. Then everyone started leaving, but they were walking across my very long train (unlike my dress) and I was gathering up it in my arms yelling, “THIS IS A THOUSAND DOLLAR DRESS, PEOPLE! GET OFF MY TRAIN! YOU GUYS SUCK!”

Weird, no?

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And one other wedding note, due to timing issues, the part of the Best Lady will now be played by Kim (aka Kim-n-Tim-Milo). Not to worry, Jamie and I are a-okay.

Kim, however, is very enthusiastic and has made the mistake of telling me she welcomes my barrage of wedding emails. So she may end up quitting before the big day. We’ll just see how much she really loves this stuff.

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General life update: our house hasn’t sold (dammit!), we still haven’t heard back from the bank regarding the new house, and things with the boy are calm and pleasant. I’ve seen Kayleigh for maybe two hours total since Sunday. She’s been at her friend’s and then at rehearsal until 11:00pm. Quite the flourishing butterfly she is.

And I’ve been having crackers or a bagel for breakfast, noodles for lunch and pasta for dinner for too many days in a row. I need some vegetables.

And it's darn near chilly today. Thank goodness.

Therapy

This is my new therapy. Tom Time.

Tom and I spend a little bit of time every evening snuggling. Normally with him laying on my chest, right around bedtime. It makes me stay in one place, and it makes me look at him and coo. How could I possibly be stressed or upset when watching such a loving kitty sleep on me?

We laid on the couch this evening, when I got home from work. Kayleigh was at a friend's, Tyler was in his room and Todd was doing some work on the computer. The house was quiet and I wanted to just rest my eyes. I called Tom up on me and I laid and looked out at the backyard, at the sun going down and the locust tree swaying in the breeze.

We laid like this for about an hour. Then it was time for a meeting, then dinner needed to be made, then the dishes cleaned up. Now it's almost time for bed.

But I got my Tom Time in. Just a bit of quiet and stillness each day. I think it's doing some good.

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I like this photo, too.

Reason # 3 Why I Hate My Job

Letters like this:

“Dear Valued Customer,

Beginning in August 2009, Ortho Clinical Diagnostics (OCD), Therakos, Inc. and Veridex, LLC will implement changes to our Customer Services to align with those of other Medical Devices & Diagnostics Companies of Johnson & Johnson. Our goal is to provide simpler, more coordinated processes for order management, billing, returns and inquiry resolution. To do this, Customer Services previously managed by OCD, Therakos and Veridex are transitioning to Johnson & Johnson Health Care Systems Inc. (JJHCS).”

Um. What?

This is what happens when a company gets too big.
Just tell me who I need to call to order crap.

Weekend Update

I told Todd last night that this was one of the best weekends I’ve had in a long time. Now, that’s saying something.

Our weekend started Friday night with the traditional pizza movie night. We made pizzas, instead of ordering in, and watched Transporter 3. I am now a huge fan of these movies. It helps that Jason Statham is just beautiful, but the fight sequences alone are enough to have me on the edge of the couch. Just awesome.

This movie, however, was probably the weakest of the three. Jason gets the woman in every movie, but why on earth did he even want this woman? I wasn’t convinced that he liked her, let alone loved her and took her fishing with him. Gimme a break. And the little strip tease scene? Lame. Jason can kill a man with his dress shirt; why on earth would he tolerate this rich little twit demanding he do a strip tease to get his car keys back? I don’t think so.

Don’t get me wrong. I didn’t mind WATCHING the strip tease. Even though he only took off his jacket, tie and shirt and he really wasn’t “teasing” at all. It was still good, cheap entertainment.

After that movie, we watched 10 Things I Hate About You because it was Eric Riedmann’s first movie and well, how could we not? (Eric played Afriel, Protector of the Children, in Todd’s movie Ordinary Angels. My mother probably gave Eric the highest compliment when, after watching OA, she said, “I really believe he would protect the children!”.) We cheered when Eric said his one and only line, then critiqued the rest of the film and tried to figure out where they were since it was filmed in Seattle.

Earlier in the evening, I made the declaration that I would be sleeping in on Saturday. And I promised ice cream to those who worked hard to help make that happen. Kayleigh obliged – she went to spend the night with her friend. Tyler obliged – he slept until 10:00am. And Todd obliged – he snuck out of the bedroom at probably 6:30am or so. I didn’t even stir until 8:30 and at 9:15, finally decided that I was sufficiently rested and got up.

And wow, what a difference sleep can make! It was a beautiful sunny day, and only really warm, not oh-please-kill-me-I-can’t-take-this-heat hot. Todd and I had some coffee and breakfast, then tidied up for the first of two open houses for the weekend. Kayleigh was hanging with her friend all day, Tyler finally got to hang out with his buddy for the day, so as of 12:45pm, Todd and I were on our own!

We went to check out some wedding bands. Muy fun. We went to look at the tux that Todd picked out and size up the colors. So pretty. We had lunch at Blue C. We swung by Costco for kitty litter. We toured a couple of hotel rooms downtown to get an idea of what we wanted in our wedding night room. And then we headed to my co-worker’s BBQ. Which turned out to be a great time. There were only about 15 or so people, but it made for a nice circle around a plastic, kiddie wading pool. The yard was huge and sunny (and hot) with the exception of a nice shady patch in the back. People threw the ball for the dog, there was a dart board and horse shoes, and her husband grilled up yummy salmon fresh from Alaska.

It’s been a long time since I’ve had such an carefree, relaxing evening. New people made for fun conversation. Todd and I throw parties all the time, but I’m in such host mode that I don’t take time to enjoy those parties. I’m too busy making sure everyone else is having a good time.

Keep this in mind if you’re coming to the wedding.

Slight tangent:
When we met with the flower guy, I was asking questions about delivery and would we need to pick up the flowers and how would I need to set them up…. The guy stopped me and said, “You are the bride. You don’t do that. WE do that.” Then he looked at Todd and said, “Tell her she doesn’t have to do anything.”

I don’t have to do anything? But..but…I don’t want to inconvience anyone!

This will be my great challenge. If you see me clearing plates, stop me. It’s a habit.

Anyway. Where was I?
Oh yes. BBQ. Fun time. Much needed.

Sunday was yet another open house (and there was maybe more sleeping in) so we got up, had breakfast (Todd made homemade cinnamon rolls – reason #74 why I love him) and then all headed out. Kayleigh went back to her friend’s, Tyler hung out with his uncle Gavin, Todd had a production meeting with Trish and Dan, and I met up with Jamie for lunch. After lunch, I stopped by to visit Kim-n-Tim-n-Milo, which I hadn’t done in ages. It was a good three house of just chilling out and catching up. Milo didn’t wake up from his nap until about the time I needed to leave, but I got to see him and say hi. He’s two now. I can’t believe how time flies.

After my visit, I picked up Tyler, we hit the grocery store for a couple of things, then arrived home to find Todd bustling around in the kitchen, prepping dinner. We had a lovely sitdown of cold pasta with basil, olive and tomatoes, as well as a Caesar salad. And then it was time for some HGTV House Hunters (I am officially addicted to this show) in the bedroom. Where it was much, much cooler.

And with the exception of the leaf blowers flaring up at 5:30am and Elvis knocking my glass of water off of my nightstand and into my slipper, it’s a pretty good Monday.

So far.
Check with me at 4pm.