Thursday, December 30, 2010

DDD Day

I ventured out of my comfort zone today and took the bus downtown.  I got a Nordstrom gift card for Christmas and needed some alone time with myself.  And with exception of a weirdo who beat on the side of the bus as we were coming to a stop, the trip was pretty uneventful.

Thank goodness.

The big news of the day (hee..."big") came when I got a free bra fitting.

Disclaimer - my faithful readers know that there is no such thing as TMI to me.  We've covered my boob scare in 2006, my abnormal cervix in 2009, my extra 25 pounds in Well Past Voluptuous and my skin tags in 2010.  My body, and it's oddities, do not embarrass me.  Maybe they should, but it takes a bit more.  If you prefer to not know so much about me, stopping reading this post right now.

Still here?  I warned you.

I had planned to buy a gray V-neck cashmere sweater from Nordy's.  Except they didn't have it in a Large.  Extra large?  Yes.  Medium?  Yes.  But no Large.  And when you're buying a cashmere sweater, you do not "make do" with the wrong size. 

So, I wandered around looking for something else to buy.  Lo and behold, I found myself in the lingerie section, of course, and I remembered that I wanted to buy new bras because mine are all many years old and the underwires squeak, which is quite embarrassing.

I've been fitted a few times in the past but it's been five or six years.  It's a free service at the fancy stores, as long as you actually buy bras there.  It's always very enlightening.  The least little bit of weight you lose or gain will affect your bra size. 

As soon as I told the nice British lady that I'd gained 30 pounds in the past few years, she cut me off and said "Let's go."

We went into a dressing room, where I took off my shirt and she measured around my ribs.  I am a 36.  Not too shabby.  Then she went to retrieve some 36 fitting bras.  She came back with two different ones and said "Look at these things!  They're engineered like a bridge!"  There's side panels and extra panels underneath.  It's truly amazing.

She put me in the first one and had me bend over and "work the girls" in the bra so they were comfy.  I looked in the mirror and was impressed.  My boobs actually looked smaller and more compact.  But still nicely shaped.  The wires were well to the sides ("They should be OUTSIDE of your breast tissue - not cutting into it - so that you are supported.") and the shoulder straps were thick and padded so they stayed up on my shoulders (I have slopey shoulders).  It was a three hook in the back, so the band was wide enough that it wouldn't bend and roll when I sat down, and no fat bubbled up and over or out the sides.  Sold!

I asked her was size cup this was.

DDD.

Swear to gawd.

Triple D.

Not D.  Not double D.  TRIPLE DDD.

I've been wearing B (very old) and C (newer) bras for five years.  Holy geez.  Have I gained that much weight?!  The very kind woman said that I just had very heavy breast tissue so it needed more of a support system.  Better "engineering", I suppose.  Panels and pulley systems and hydraulic pistons.  Hey!  I'm not fat, I'm just high maintenance.

I ended up buying one (very expensive) bra and think maybe I'll just go to Target or Fred Meyer to get a few cheaper ones in an accurate size.  But I have to stay, I felt beautiful walking around .

When I got home, asked Todd if he still loved his fat, high maintenance wife.  He correctly replied yes.  And now he now says "Raechelle!  In 3D!  I don't even need special glasses!"

It's a good thing he's cute.

I think this has been the foot in my ass I need to lose weight.  I do not like being a DDD.  I am 5'2".  That's just.....wrong.



Those are a C cup, at most....

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Like I said, Aunt Jeannie made over!

Love ya, mom

Dee said...

Bragger. (I haven't been on here to read your blog in forever)!