Monday, January 7, 2008

Granny Rae

I had a massage tonight and boy howdy, was it much needed. I am one big knot from head to toe. Everything hurts. Baffling.

After my massage, I stopped at Bartell's to get a couple of boxes of Epsom salt so I could take a soakie tonight. That word looks weird. Am I the only (beside my parents) who says "soakie"? Anyway, got the Epsom salts and then ran across the heating pads and ice packs. I keep saying I need to buy both of these things but the top dog heating pad was a bit expensive so I'll have to save up for that. But I went ahead and got the ice packs.

Then I remembered that a friend told me Aleve might be good for my knees because they've been hurting lately. Most notably, on the plane to and from Houston. I didn't get up during the whole flight (yes, I know this is bad and that's what causes blood clots, blah blah blah). So I when I finally did stretch my legs out my knees just refused to straighten. They were so very sore. They've always made noises, and that's just fine, but now they hurt. Not good at all. So I got some Aleve to see if that would help.

Anyway! Point of this story. I get up to the register to pay and lucky me gets the very young, barely out of high school, probably doesn't have a pain in her body except for the pain in her heart because Cody or Devin or whoever didn't ask her to the big dance, because Jennifer (that slut!) started a rumor that our little checker girl was a prude and everyone knows that no high school boy wants to take a prude to the big dance because his friends would totally rag on him because they're gettin' some and he ain't because he took the known prude!

Where was I?

Oh yeah, the little checker takes all of these items out of my basket (two boxes of Epsom salts, two ice packs, and a box of Aleve), very slowly, and looks at me after she scans each thing. As if to say, "What are you? Like, old or something?"

Oh, for cryin' out loud. I got pain, okay! Just ring up the frickin items and let me get home so I can take my soakie and have a cup of hot bedtime tea before I conk out on the couch! Sheesh!

Wait.......

[pause]

That's it.
I'm going out tomorrow night.

5 comments:

Mom said...

There is absolutely nothing wrong with the word "soakie". It looks fine and it's a darn good word and you feel great after you take one!

Richard said...

People that go into Bartell's are either old, sick, or dying their hair a shade they will later regret. Of these options old isn't bad.

Anonymous said...

No, no, Richard! Bartell's is a great locally-owned store. Buy local! (And, well, yes, you're right, old isn't bad.)

Kristin said...

Yes, you and your parent's are the only people who use the word "soakie" I'm afraid. But I might have to start using it. I like it.

Dee said...

I have a friend who calls them "tubbies." See - "soakie" isn't that bad. I see what you mean though - "soakie" looks weird.